IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

The usage and influence of
media
 in our daily lives and society have increased significantly across the globe in recent years, making it an essential part of our routines.
Media
 in various forms,
such
 as newspapers, television, radio, and the internet, benefit people of all ages. Young people,
in particular
, are heavily influenced by
media
,
while
 other age groups
also
 use it to access material, entertainment, and the latest updates on various topics. The pivotal role of
media
 in education cannot be overstated, with many public using electronic
media
 to complete their assignments and projects. Platforms
such
 as YouTube offer vast educational content to aid learning.
Media
also
 offer diverse programs to entertain and inform their audiences, providing updates on global issues and bringing the community together. Despite the advantages of
media
, their increasing usage has
also
 led to some negative impacts on society. In their quest for higher ratings,
media
 outlets prioritise negative news and highlight the darker aspects of society, exacerbating the population's anxieties and worries.
Moreover
, the reliance on
media
 for entertainment and instruction has reduced physical activity levels, leading to health issues
such
 as obesity and anxiety.
Media
 outlets may
also
 exhibit political bias, prioritise monetary gains, and seek revenge, resulting in the dissemination of false clues and manipulation of public opinion.
However
, despite these drawbacks, the benefits of
media
 outweigh their disadvantages.
Media
 provide a platform for individuals to voice their opinions against corruption and other societal ills, promoting independent thought and expression. In conclusion,
while
media
 has revolutionised modern life, individuals must remain mindful of the potential adverse effects of
media
 consumption.
Media
 consumption should be balanced with other activities. Individuals must be critical of the instruction presented, actively seeking diverse perspectives and questioning the biases and motivations behind
media
 outlets' messaging.
Submitted by ashissarker18 on

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task achievement
The essay presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the task requires you to give reasons and include relevant examples. While you presented reasons, there could have been more specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
You have structured your essay into clear paragraphs with an introduction and a conclusion, which is good. However, ensure that you are developing each paragraph fully with a clear main idea and supporting details.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • bilingual
  • multilingual
  • fluency
  • communicate
  • cognitive skills
  • cultural awareness
  • opportunities
  • globalized world
  • job market
  • interact
  • linguistic abilities
  • cultural exchange
  • language proficiency
  • language barrier
  • foreign travel
  • personal growth
  • academic achievement
  • self-confidence
  • enhance
  • cross-cultural communication
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