Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Certain individuals contend that governmental entities ought to strive for the reduction of environmental
and housing challenges, with the intention of alleviating illness and maladies. I completely agree with the notion, for through the resolution of these interrelated issues, administrations can substantively ameliorate public well-being and curtail the burden on healthcare systems.
, curbing water
can abate waterborne diseases. Tainted water sources have the potential to shelter pathogens responsible for afflictions
as cholera and dysentery.
, diminishing air
levels can significantly curtail respiratory ailments.
air laden with particulate matter and noxious gases exacerbates conditions like asthma and chronic obstructive pulmonary disease, thereby fostering an environment conducive to respiratory infections. The World Health Organization’s estimation, which indicates that ambient air
for instance
, contributes to over four million premature deaths annually underscores the gravity of
, adequate housing conditions can thwart the proliferation of vector-borne diseases.
For example
, densely populated habitats in slums often become breeding sites for disease-transmitting mosquitoes,
amplifying the susceptibility of malaria and dengue fever. By providing habitable dwellings with proper ventilation and sanitation, governments can stymie the transmission of these diseases.
, inadequate housing aggravates psychological well-being concerns, inciting conditions
as hypertension and anxiety, stemming from the absence of a stable and congenial residential environment. In conclusion, I firmly concur that to avert illnesses, authorities must preemptively address ecological contamination and housing challenges, since by doing so, societies can expect healthier populations, reduced disease encumbrances, and ultimately, more robust and sustainable healthcare systems.
Submitted by ashissarker18 on

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task response
Your essay presents a clear viewpoint throughout, reflecting a fully developed position. However, ensure that examples used are specific and directly relevant to the topic at hand. Incorporating real-life statistics or studies could strengthen your argument further.
coherence and cohesion
The essay demonstrates a logical organization of ideas with appropriate paragraphing. To enhance cohesion, continue employing a variety of cohesive devices, but also consider varying your sentence structures to maintain the reader's interest.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.


I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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