The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Science
is considerably a part of human lives
and always developing day by day. People
are expecting it should be able to improve human life. I strongly agree with this
statement that promoting our lives
is one of the science
important purposes.
The are several reasons why I believe that science
should be able to promote our lives
better with some further
development involved. Without Correct your spelling
science
sience
new technology Add a comma
sience,
will
not Wrong verb form
would
appears
and Change the verb form
appear
science
has changed our lives
dramatically through some benefits over centuries such
as in communication, transportation, health or even the availability of goods and nutrients. Through science
everyone in this
world can access the variety of goods that they need, It also
provides a better life in human health with the development of drugs, therapies, surgery techniques and so on.
In terms of relying on science
, people
will not be disappointed because since helps us a lot. Science
has become the pioneer for people
to grow for example
, without science
we would not be able to see clearly at night because there is no longer light to help us in the dark also
everyone must walk over a kilometre away every day because there is no vehicle invented. Perhaps without science
people
who are threatened by disease have no idea with their lives
continuesly
.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
continue
science
aims to improve our lives
, although
obviously without science
there will be no other improvement nowadays. If people
expect science
can improve their lives
further
, I suggest everyone should appreciate every tiny inventions
by scientists and the government should support Change to a singular noun
invention
science
programs with a great fund.Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay requires a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The logical structure can be improved by having a more organized flow of ideas, establishing clear relationships between them.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but would benefit from a more concise thesis statement and a clearer summary of the essay's main points, respectively.
coherence cohesion
Main points are supported, however, they lack specific examples and elaboration to fully develop your arguments. Aim to include precise evidence or examples to back up your points.
task achievement
Your essay partially addresses the essay topic, but it is essential to fully respond to the question with a clear opinion and thorough development of ideas related to science improving people's lives.
task achievement
Ideas presented are appropriate, but they could be articulated more comprehensively and clearly. Focus on expanding your points with detailed explanations and a more careful structuring of paragraphs.
task achievement
Relevant examples are mentioned, but they are not specific enough and lack details. Illustrate your points with concrete instances to strengthen the argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.