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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems. What are those problems and how could they be reduced?

It is true that
movies
Use synonyms
 can be dangerous for social communities ,and the percentage is increasing every year. It has many reasons why
movies
Use synonyms
 are negative for communities so,
this
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 essay will discuss
this
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 statement and will give reasons and how to solve
this
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 situation.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the reason why
films
Use synonyms
are
Verb problem
have
show examples
 many negatives. First of all, some channels show role models that
very
Add a missing verb
are very
show examples
 bad people, and some children copy them.
For instance
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, some American
movies
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 show people who can kill others like heroes, so many young people copy them.
In addition
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, the survey found that 80 per cent of crimes between
years
Correct article usage
the years
show examples
 2012 to 2020 were from
movies
Use synonyms
.
Thus
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, I think that the cause that
films
Use synonyms
 are harmful to society because some directors have been shown bad role models in their
films
Use synonyms
. For the way to solve
this
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 action directors of TV programs should show a good model ,and the government should support good
movies
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, parents and teachers should teach children.
Such
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 as teachers can tell students in their classes that
this
Linking Words
 is a good movie ,and students need to watch it. I believe that if everyone teaches students and children in
films
Use synonyms
, they will understand ,and the problem will be reduced. So, I think that the best way to solve
this
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 situation is for everyone to support a good movie.
To sum up
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, I believe that the main reason why the high levels of violence in
films
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 today are causing serious social problems is a role models from
movies
Use synonyms
 ,and the way to reduce them is for everyone should control them. So, I believe that the number of crimes will decline.

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task achievement
Ensure a clear position throughout the response and fully address all parts of the task.
task achievement
Support main points with specific details or examples.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of cohesive devices appropriately and accurately.
coherence cohesion
Organize information and ideas logically, ensuring clear progression throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Use paragraphing, but ensure it is not too mechanical; develop ideas within the paragraphs.
task achievement
Use a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the essay's readability and expressivity.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • desensitization
  • empathy
  • aggressive behaviors
  • imitation
  • antisocial behavior
  • normalization
  • climate of fear
  • perceptions
  • mental health
  • aggression
  • emotional regulation
  • trauma-related symptoms
  • age ratings
  • critical viewing skills
  • nonviolent entertainment
  • film industry
  • regulate
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