IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Young children have a special talent for language learning. Children should be taught other languages at an early age.

#children #talent #language #languages #age
Although
 learning for
children
 is not easy, they need a new method to understand the subject. They can use a new method from a
book
,
such
 as a picture
book
. These days,
children
 can access the internet to get a
book
, and it can help them understand the subjects with pictures from a
book
.
For example
,
children
 in elementary school can use picture books to learn other
languages
while
 playing by demonstrating movements from the
book
.
On the other hand
, the most crucial part of learning other
languages
 comes from their
parents
. All control for
children
 is at home, where they can learn with their
parents
,
such
 as by playing video games together. With the help of
parents
, it can help
children
 enjoy the process of learning other
languages
. Nowadays,
parents
 give mobile phones to their
children
 to allow them to easily access new information and learn
languages
 on their own.
For example
,
children
 can use Google or YouTube to learn other
languages
 with animation. Using the internet to learn other
languages
 is easier because
children
 can access it anytime they need to. In conclusion, learning other
languages
 for
children
 using new methods
such
 as picture books and the internet to understand the subjects is easier for them, and with all the help from their
parents
, it can help them at home.
Submitted by musa.nuwa on

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task response
Ensure your introduction clearly presents the topic and your viewpoint. The conclusion should effectively summarize the main points made in the body paragraphs, reflecting back on the initial argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing a clear and consistent structure for your essay. Use paragraphs effectively to separate main points, with clear topic sentences that guide the reader through your argument.
task response
Make sure your main points are supported with specific details and examples. Avoid general statements and strive to give clear and precise evidence that demonstrates your points.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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