IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

The best way to solve the world's environmental problems is to increase the cost of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#world #cost #fuel
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Fuel
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is one of the most important resources known to humankind.Plays an important role in our daily life.
However
Linking Words
,it causes environmental problems.It is agreed that the best way to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem is to
grow
Verb problem
raise
show examples
 the price of gas. To start with,a rise in the material price might be the solution to the problem but that cannot
last
Linking Words
 for too long.Rising costs
such
Linking Words
 as petrol, oil, and natural gases could help address global issues. Industrial sectors, especially fossil fuel power plants, ought to find alternative energy sources inclusive of nuclear and renewable energy to replace them with.
This
Linking Words
 would lead to fewer greenhouse gases and emissions which are released into the atmosphere,
as well as
Linking Words
 mitigate global warming and pollution. Another reason is that,if they increase the cost of fuel,individuals will use
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
electric cars,bicycles or public transportation
instead
Linking Words
 of driving private cars.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 could
also
Linking Words
 help reduce the number of exhaust fumes produced in the atmosphere.
Therefore
Linking Words
,to reduce carbon dioxide emissions which
comes
Correct subject-verb agreement
come
show examples
 from vehicles,we should
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
buy hybrid or electric cars.
For instance
Linking Words
:Tesla model X,Zeekr 009,Mercedes-Benz EQS.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 the increasing petrol costs could somewhat contribute to the improvement of our living conditions. There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
end
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
 number of cons of ammunition but we cannot deny the pros of the gas.
Submitted by marina.parmenova on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence and Cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and logical structure. There is no clear introduction, body, and conclusion that clearly expresses the candidate's position and develops arguments systematically. To improve, ensure that each paragraph contains one main idea supported by relevant explanations and examples. Additionally, make use of cohesive devices to guide the reader smoothly from one point to the next.
Task Achievement
While the task is generally addressed, there are limited clear and comprehensive ideas presented to support the argument. Responses should be developed more fully with detailed explanations and arguments that directly relate to the thesis. It's important to clearly state whether you agree or disagree with the statement and then consistently maintain and justify that stance throughout the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: