IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think the best way to solve the traffic congestions in cities is to provide free public transports for 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A fraction
or
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
individuals
Use synonyms
 think argue that unpaid transit facilities during day and night
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 a top-notch remedy to prevent
traffic
Use synonyms
 bottlenecks.
Although
Linking Words
 it could encourage people to commute
through
Change preposition
by
show examples
 public motor
vehicles
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 alone cannot solve the
traffic
Use synonyms
 headache for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 government. The main advantage of offering free municipal
transport
Use synonyms
 is that people will be motivated by the monetary rewards of using local buses. In light of rising fuel prices, many
low income
Add a hyphen
low-income
show examples
 group
individuals
Use synonyms
 will be excited about the prospectus of saving more money by choosing government's commute
vehicles
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 will be
also
Linking Words
 auspicious for people
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 shorter distances who avoid high fixed prices of buses and subway tickets.
For example
Linking Words
, if in Montreal travellers pay $3.50 for any stop on a bus route, it is logical for them to use their car which
comsumes
Correct your spelling
consumes
 only
few
Change the article
a few
show examples
 cents of gas to cover a couple of miles.
However
Linking Words
, these measures are not enough to uproot the challenges of long queues of cars
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
roads
Correct article usage
the roads
show examples
. It is important to educate residents about the demerits of using personal
transport
Use synonyms
 all the
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 could be achieved by spreading awareness about
deleterious
Correct article usage
the deleterious
show examples
 impacts of
traffic
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as
fatal
Correct article usage
the fatal
show examples
 consequences for a patient carried in an ambulance
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 got stuck in a
traffic
Use synonyms
 jam.
Also
Linking Words
,
stick
Correct article usage
a stick
show examples
 and carrot reward system can be used here.The perks
such
Linking Words
 as tax benefits can be offered to citizens who have
history
Add an article
a history
show examples
 of traveling more miles.
For example
Linking Words
, they could get a certificate of
an annual miles
Correct the article-noun agreement
annual miles
an annual mile
show examples
 travelled from their country's
transport
Use synonyms
 authority , and based upon
substantial
Add an article
a substantial
show examples
 drop in those
figues
Correct your spelling
figures
,
individuals
Use synonyms
 could qualify for tax deductions. In conclusion,
whereas
Linking Words
 free public
transport
Use synonyms
 facilities could be a motivating factor for many
individuals
Use synonyms
 to give up their
vehicles
Use synonyms
, the significance of awareness in reducing burgeoning lineups of
motorvehicles
Correct your spelling
motor vehicles
motor-vehicles
 on streets cannot be overlooked.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I partially agree that only making buses and subway fares
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
priceless will not solve the
Use synonyms
vehicles
Change the noun form
vehicle
show examples
 bottlenecks and hurdles. I recommend that nations need to use
multi-faceted
Add an article
a multi-faceted
the multi-faceted
show examples
 approach which should
also
Linking Words
 incorporate education programs.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear and logical structure. Spend adequate time planning the organization of paragraphs and transitions to sequence ideas effectively.
Coherence & Cohesion
Include an explicit introduction and conclusion. The introduction should clearly state your position regarding the question, whereas the conclusion should summarize the points made and restate your opinion.
Coherence & Cohesion
Develop main points with specific details and explanations. Rather than making general statements, support each point with evidence, examples, or further analysis to add weight to your argument.
Task Achievement
Focus on fully responding to the task prompt. Address all parts of the task question in a balanced manner and ensure that your position is clear and maintained throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
Ensure that ideas are expressed in a clear and comprehensive manner. Use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures to articulate points effectively without ambiguity or redundancy.
Task Achievement
Incorporate relevant and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. Examples should directly support the ideas discussed and illustrate the points being made in a concrete way.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • public transportation
  • private vehicles
  • reduce
  • encourage
  • accommodate
  • improve
  • emissions
  • sustainable
  • eco-friendly
  • cost-intensive
  • allocate
  • significant funds
  • taxes
  • public services
  • safety
  • security
  • challenge
  • overcrowding
  • inconvenience
  • prefer
What to do next:
Look at other essays: