Many young people choose to take a year out between finishing school and starting university in order to gain work experience or to travel. The experience of non-academic life this offers benefits the individual when they return to education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #year #school #university #gain #work #travel #life #education

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Nowaday

Correct your spelling

Nowadays

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, the young generation decide to take a

gap

Use synonyms

year between finishing high school and beginning

university

Use synonyms

in order to gain work experience or to travel. In my opinion, I both agree and disagree with

this

Linking Words

trend. On the one hand, teenagers have

time

Use synonyms

to relax after examinations.

Finishing

Change preposition

After finishing

show examples

general

Correct article usage

the general

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education program, they have

time

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to rest and prepare for a new journey.

However

Linking Words

, it is not enough for some people who want to have other

experiences

Use synonyms

. It is the model

time

Use synonyms

to take it, before returning to

university

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as a freshman.

Moreover

Linking Words

, they

also

Linking Words

have a chance to visit somewhere and have interesting

experiences

Use synonyms

. Not only arriving

Change preposition

show examples

new areas, meeting a

lot

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of friends but

also

Linking Words

having a chance to be themself that are the most valuable

experiences

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Additionally

Linking Words

, the youth might expand a

lot

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of knowledge about many aspects like culture, nature,

lifestyle

Correct word choice

and lifestyle

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,… Those are things that can only be obtained through realistic

experiences

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and universities do not impart them.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, youngsters need a

lot

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of money and

time

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in order to start it, especially money and

time

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. Because they are only 18 years old, expenses for activities still mainly come from asking their parents. And the generation

gap

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is the reason why they can not

fulfill

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fulfil

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it. Their parents think it is a waste of

time

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and money.

Besides

Linking Words

, it has a

lot

Use synonyms

of psychological influences that make them not want to return to school. A survey shows that most of the young who take a

gap

Use synonyms

year do not return to

university

Use synonyms

Linking Words

instead

Add a comma

instead,

show examples

they choose to continue working and participate in non-academic life.

Finally

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

experience creates a trend for other young people who are not aware of

this

Linking Words

. Among them, there are many people who are not properly aware of the problem. Some teenagers might be distracted from studying because they

under-estimate

Correct your spelling

underestimate

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the importance of education. In conclusion, I not only agree but

also

Linking Words

disagree with the youth

opt

Wrong verb form

opting

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to take a

gap

Use synonyms

year out after finishing general education and preparing to go to

university

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. Since they can gain a

lot

Use synonyms

experiences

Fix the agreement mistake

experience

show examples

, it is not easy for them to keep track

with

Change preposition

show examples

educational

Correct pronoun usage

their educational

show examples

life.

Submitted by ntl250605 on Tue Nov 21 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Clearly state your position in response to the question. Make sure your introduction explicitly states if you agree or disagree with the given statement.

task achievement

Develop clear, relevant main ideas in each paragraph. Ensure that you provide specific examples and support for each idea.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay in a logical manner with distinct paragraphs for introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a clear central idea.

coherence cohesion

Use cohesive devices effectively to link ideas and paragraphs. Avoid overuse or incorrect usage that can confuse the reader.

coherence cohesion

Correct grammatical errors and ensure proper sentence structure to improve readability and convey your ideas more clearly.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

365 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Gap year
Non-academic life
Resume
Job market
Personal development
Broaden their worldviews
Academic pressures
Renewed focus
Loss of academic momentum
Career goals
Informed decisions
Soft skills
Communication
Problem-solving
Adaptability
Financial burden
Prolonged break

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Many young people choose to take a year out between finishing school and starting university in order to gain work experience or to travel. The experience of non-academic life this offers benefits the individual when they return to education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

in some countries, more and more people research the history of the buildings where they live in. what are the reasons. how can people research this

People aim to achieve the balance between their work and lives. But few people achieve it. What are the causes of the problem and how to overcome it?

These days many people leave their country to work abroad and take their family with them. Do you think benefits of this outweigh disadvantages in terms of family development?

The following is a diagram of the mobile phone recycling process.

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. do the advantage of this situation outweight disadvantages?