An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?

#professionals #doctors #teachers #countries #work #situation

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Huge

Change the article

A huge

The huge

show examples

number of specialists, like doctors and professors are abandoning their own poor

nation

Fix the agreement mistake

nations

show examples

work

Use synonyms

in developed countries.

As a result

Linking Words

Correct article usage

the long

show examples

long term

Add a hyphen

long-term

show examples

goals of the nation could be compromised. And so,

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should facilitate individuals contributing more to an

economy

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

professional

Fix the agreement mistake

professionals

show examples

such

Linking Words

as a teacher, would be creating future technicians, engineers, and other specialists, if that professional is not present in the future,

than

Replace the word

then

show examples

Use synonyms

economy

Add an article

the economy

show examples

would worsen and

thus

Linking Words

, productivity would plummet.

Thus

Linking Words

, the

country

Use synonyms

would have to recruit foreign experts and pay handsomely to get them to

work

Use synonyms

in the

country

Use synonyms

As a result

Linking Words

Use synonyms

economy

Add an article

the economy

show examples

of the

country

Use synonyms

would worsen over time.

Subsequently

Linking Words

long term

Add a hyphen

long-term

show examples

aims

such

Linking Words

to rectify

Change the verb form

rectifying

show examples

current

Correct article usage

the current

show examples

account,

achieve

Wrong verb form

achieving

show examples

income stability and full

employement

Correct your spelling

employment

could be compromised.

For instance

Linking Words

, experts leaving Pakistan has caused companies and organisations to suffer heavy losses and

thus

Linking Words

have become

burden

Add an article

a burden

show examples

to the

economy

Use synonyms

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, perks

such

Linking Words

as high salaries,

house

Wrong verb form

housing

show examples

promotion

Fix the agreement mistake

promotions

show examples

and

free-fuel

Correct your spelling

free fuel

show examples

can tempt those individuals to stay in their home

country

Use synonyms

and

work

Use synonyms

here.

For example

Linking Words

Chinese

Correct article usage

the Chinese

show examples

government facilitates experts and

this

Linking Words

technique has worked

wonderfully-well

Correct your spelling

wonderfully well

show examples

for them, as China is currently one of the biggest

exporter

Change to a plural noun

exporters

show examples

of various goods.

To sum up

Linking Words

, Every individual is looking to achieve career advancement and by providing facilities to specialist individuals,

poorer

Add an article

the poorer

a poorer

show examples

Use synonyms

country

Fix the agreement mistake

countries

show examples

can get them to stay and

work

Use synonyms

for the

economy

Use synonyms

Submitted by irazalalji on Tue Nov 21 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

The essay generally addresses the task, however, a clearer position could have been established in the introduction. Ensure that the thesis statement clearly outlines the problems and solutions to be discussed.

coherence and cohesion

The essay lacks a clear progression of ideas and the use of cohesive devices is limited, which hinders the logical flow. More varied and skillful use of these devices can greatly enhance coherence.

task achievement

Support for the main points is present but not fully developed. Include more specific details and real-world examples to substantiate the arguments and enhance the persuasiveness of the essay.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

226 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Brain drain
Skilled professionals
Healthcare systems
Education systems
Economic growth
Dependency on foreign aid
Social inequality
Quality healthcare
Quality education
Retain talent
International cooperation
Sustainable growth
Scholarships
Professional development
Remote work capabilities
Local research funding

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?
It is undeniable that health care system has become an essential part of our life. It’s developing rapidly. Various achievements have been made already. All of them helping us to gain new knowledge and saves many lives every single day. It provides us to feel better and live longer.
7.5
band
In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?
In today's society era, foreigner's meal is more high-rated than local cooking. According to the writer’s opinion, this is because imported food has better standards, and guarantees the cooking’s quality and safety. Additionally, buying local meals will support the government and improve the quality of the community’s bread.
7
band
more and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in foreign country. do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?
Many students are deciding to study abroad at colleges and universities outside their country. I believe that studying in a foreign country gives numerous benefits for students so that they can be independent and some drawbacks can also be observed.
6.5
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
One of the most prevalent trends in the contemporary world is the cumulative increase in stress by their guardians to reach their children's goals. While some people argue that increased competition creates depression, while others believe that they can achieve goals with hard work. Both sides of this topic will be carefully analysed before constructing an inference.
6
band
In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
In this economy, some notions are encouraging little ones that by trying their best and putting a great effort into anything, they will eventually be successful in their chosen path. In my perspective, this mindset is not accurate and its drawbacks outweigh the benefits.

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What solutions can you suggest to deal with this situation?

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed?

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? What could be done to encourage people to buy local food?

more and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in foreign country. do the benefits of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?