It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is thought by some that only sports persons or musicians are gifted with certain talent
,
when they Remove the comma
apply
born
, Add a missing verb
are born
while
others believe that the skills
required to become Correct article usage
a sportsmen
sportsmen
and musician can be acquired by any child. Fix the agreement mistake
sportsman
While
,
some Remove the comma
apply
people
are born with these skills
because of their genetic formation, I believe that they can be learned at any age because it only needs individual's
determination and Correct article usage
an individual's
practice
.
Some people
are gifted with special skills
because their one
of the
parents are good either in Correct article usage
apply
sport
or music. When a small living body is in Fix the agreement mistake
sports
mother's
womb, it can listen Correct article usage
a mother's
or
sense the outside world, and whatever experiences or activities mothers observe or engage in, Change preposition
to or
it
affects their psychology and Correct pronoun usage
apply
shape
their genetic formation. Change the verb form
shapes
For instance
, a famous Indian pianist mentioned in one
of his interviews that his mother used to play piano during her pregnancy, which is why, he had a knack of
playing it even when he was a child. Change preposition
for
However
, it is not true for everyone and these skills
can be learned with practice
and if one
is determined.
Being good at sport
or music demands commitment and Fix the agreement mistake
sports
practice
. When children devote time, energy, effort and practice
every day to master these skills
, they start becoming better. This
is because of the fact that practicing
something constantly for a long period of time improves their cognitive abilities, which helps them to improve their performance in their area of interest. Take Change the spelling
practising
the
swimming as an example, Correct article usage
apply
this
is the
skill no Correct article usage
a
one
can born with, when people
learn and practice
, then only
they become able to float on the surface of the water. Rephrase
apply
For
this
reason, I believe that sport
or music can be learned by any child.
In conclusion, I believe that Fix the agreement mistake
sports
practice
and determination are the two important elements to acquire any skill, although
there are some people
who born
with special talents, which is rare and only because of their genetic formation.Add a missing verb
are born
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task achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both views provided and offering a personal opinion. However, to improve, it's important to ensure that the discussion is balanced and each view is explored thoroughly. Your opinion is stated, but the supporting arguments could be reinforced with more compelling and varied examples.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on organizing ideas more logically, and use a wider range of linking phrases to improve the flow between ideas. There are instances where the logical progression is not as clear as it could be.