Disruptive school students have negative impact on their studies . Students are noisy and disobedient should grouped together and teaching separately. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, there is a dilemma about how schools should teach disobedient and noisy
students
. Whilst some people think that all students
should be taught together, I believe that disobedient students
must be taught separately from normal students
because they are suffering from them.
On the one hand, all students
have the right to study
where they want to study
and the administration of schools can not just separate them into groups by their behaviour. It is a kind of discrimination and this
can cause some problems. For example
, students
who are studying in a "bad" group will not change their behaviour and will not study
properly because all students
in this
group are similar and there is not a good example to follow.
On the other hand
, bad students
are often disturbing and because of them, normal students
who want to learn and study
in school are suffering. Disruptive school students
often bring so many troubles that is
disturbing to get proper education for obedient regular students
. For instance
, they interfere with the lecture and get all the attention of the classroom causing them not to understand the course. And at the end
of the day, they are just like an obstacle in the way to education.
In conclusion, despite the fact that all students
have the right to choose where to study
, I think that the impact of disobedient students
is more worth paying attention to. So that is
why I think that the disruptive students
should be taught separately from the others.Submitted by aikumarbekarys on
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coherence cohesion
The essay presents a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which satisfies the minimum organizational requirements. However, it would benefit from a clearer and more logical progression of ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and the supporting sentences should be more developed.
coherence cohesion
There is some repetition of ideas and vocabulary, showing a lack of range in language use and linking words. To improve cohesion, use a greater variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more fluidly within and between paragraphs.
task achievement
You have addressed the task by stating your opinion and providing reasons. However, the response could be more fully developed. Present more elaborated arguments and include more relevant, specific examples to support your points. This will demonstrate an ability to discuss ideas in detail and lead to a higher task achievement score.
task achievement
Your essay lacks clear, comprehensive ideas. The main points should be more thoroughly explained and paragraphs should be expanded with further details and examples. This will enhance clarity and show that you can discuss issues comprehensively.
task achievement
The use of examples in your essay is minimal and they are not fully developed to support your argument effectively. It is important to include relevant, specific examples in each body paragraph that clearly illustrate your main points. This will provide concrete evidence to back up your arguments and increase your task achievement score.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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