The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

#growth #shops #towns #cities

All physical shops will be closed and replaced by online shopping in the future.

This

essay agrees with

this

statement because online

platforms

provide massive promotional campaigns and

people

can buy things that have not been available yet in the nearest stores.

Firstly

, several online selling

platforms

offer seasonal discounts and promotions to attract buyers. They usually offer extra discounts and flash sales of various products on special double dates

such

as November 11 or December 12. These campaigns get a lot of

people

's interest because they are excited about cheaper products.

This

occasion repeats every month

thus

people

already expect and deliberately postpone their shopping plans to match the promotion date.

For example

, Shopee always campaigns their double date events

such

as 11.11 which offers free delivery charges and cashback. Shopee holds flash sales for certain products, which only cost Rp 99, far cheaper than the actual prices.

Secondly

, for some

people

, shopping online provides more choices for them to buy their desired goods. Especially for residents of rural areas, the nearby retailers rarely provide a wide variety of goods, including imported ones.

For instance

, CeRave is a good moisturizer for whoever suffering from eczema and it has been recommended by dermatologists to lessen the irritations.

However

this

product is only available in retail shops that specifically sell healthcare goods and mostly are found in metropolitan areas.

Thus

people

who need

this

product can order it through electronic commercial

platforms

without having to travel far to the city. In conclusion, the advancement in the online shopping industry may cause all physical shops to close their businesses down because online

platforms

provide more discounts and cheaper prices.

Furthermore

, they enable residents in rural areas to purchase their necessities without needing to travel.

Submitted by intanannisa.ia on Wed Nov 22 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction clearly presents the topic and your position on the issue, providing a roadmap for the essay. In the body, develop each main point in its own paragraph with clear topic sentences. Use a range of linking phrases to show the relationship between ideas.

task achievement

Make sure to cover all parts of the task. Present a balanced view even if you agree or disagree, to show the full extent of the topic. Also, ensure that your conclusion summarizes your main points and reiterates your position on the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

292 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

e-commerce
brick-and-mortar
physical stores
online retailers
retail apocalypse
digital economy
consumer behavior
sustainability
commercial landscape
high-street
consumer trends
augmented reality
showrooms
carbon footprint

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The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of remote work.

Scientists have been warning for many years about protecting the environment and that people must limit the use of energy in their daily lives. Despite warnings, many people do not do so. What are the reasons for this and how can people be encouraged to protect the environment?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that to become successful in sports, one should have a natural talent. Others, however, think that perseverance and practice are more crucial to success. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.