Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety.

#people #punishments #offences #traffic #accidents #measures #road #safety

Recently ,

road

traffic

accidents

have become an overwhelming issue in public

safety

.There is a belief that it is better to punish strictly those who are driving badly

while

some

people

hold the idea that to take other effective measures

instead

.In my perspective, it is worth punishing for unsafe driving. In

this

essay, I will discuss both views and try to draw some conclusions.

Road

traffic

accidents

not only affect the community but

also

the state. Recent studies have found that the government had to pay annually , a huge cost on health related to

road

traffic

accidents

Consequently

lossing

Correct your spelling

losing

the lives of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

and being disabled with restricted activities of daily living are the negative impacts which affect the economy of the country.

hence

, if

people

are punished for the offences they try to follow the security options their selves as much as possible.

On the other hand

although

the government has introduced a set of rules and regulations on

road

safety

, most

people

are unaware.

Therefore

, it is necessary to hold awareness programmes,

Replace the word

advertise

show examples

and display

safety

precautions and sign posts in public areas.

For instance

traffic

light

system

Fix the agreement mistake

systems

show examples

and

traffic

signs play a major role in the

safety

of both drivers

as well as

pedestrians.So

that

Correct determiner usage

apply

show examples

, the occurrence of

traffic

accidents

can be controlled to some extent. In conclusion, by launching punishments and fines, both drivers and pedestrians can be controlled and it is the responsibility of the government to enhance the awareness of the public.

Thus

, I strongly suppose that strict punishments for driving offences may lead to minimising

traffic

accidents

Submitted by udesudeshikakalpani11 on Wed Nov 22 2023

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coherence cohesion

Refine your essay's structure by presenting a clear thesis statement early on and ensuring each paragraph develops a single main idea.

coherence cohesion

Improve coherence by ensuring clear connections between sentences and paragraphs. Use discourse markers effectively.

task achievement

Provide specific, detailed examples to support your points. Vague references to studies and general statements need concrete evidence.

task achievement

Ensure you address all parts of the task. Discuss both views and your own opinion throughout the essay, not just at the beginning and end.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Teachers in this modern era are unvalued by society than they were in the past. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Some people think movies should only be for entertainment. Others think that they should also have educational values. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting University studies. Discuss the advantage and disadvantage for young people who decide to do this.

Every one of us should become a vegetarian because eating meat can cause serious health problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?