In many parts of world, children and teenagers are committing more crimes. what are the causes? how should these young criminals to be punished?

#in #parts #world #children #teenagers #crimes #criminals

Nowadays, there is an ongoing debate about whether

parents

should face penalties when their kids violate the law, as they are deemed responsible for their actions. I wholeheartedly support

this

perspective. First and foremost, mothers and fathers bear a legal obligation to supervise and care for their

children

, and when a child violates the law, it may signify a lapse in parental duties.

For instance

, if a minor is repeatedly involved in vandalism, authorities may investigate the child's home environment. If it is determined that the

parents

have neglected their duty to instil discipline and guide the juvenile's behaviour, the legal system could impose penalties on the

parents

such

as fines or mandatory parenting courses.

This

example illustrates how legal repercussions for guardians can result from their failure to fulfil their legal obligations. It emphasizes the importance of responsible parenting and ensuring a safe and nurturing environment for their

children

Furthermore

, imposing penalties on

parents

of juveniles who engage in criminal activities may serve as a powerful deterrent, influencing other guardians to assume greater responsibility for their

children

's behaviour.

This

, in turn, could contribute to preventing future criminal activities by kids. Ultimately leading to a reduction in the

overall

crime rate. By emphasizing parental accountability for their child's actions, the legal system aims to convey a strong message that

parents

must actively participate in the education of their youth, taking measures to deter them from involvement in criminal behaviours. In conclusion, I firmly contend that mothers and fathers should face consequences when their kids violate the law, as they are held accountable for their

children

's actions.

This

approach not only reinforces the importance of responsible parenting but

also

contributes to the

overall

safety and well-being of the community.

Submitted by xiaoruoling7 on Wed Nov 22 2023

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task achievement

Ensure that the essay directly addresses all components of the prompt. The essay should provide both causes of youth crime and suggested punishments, whereas this essay focuses primarily on the punishment aspect, particularly the responsibility of the parents, without addressing the causes of youth crimes as per the topic given.

coherence and cohesion

Use a range of cohesive devices to demonstrate logical sequencing of ideas and paragraphs. While the essay shows some degree of coherence, it could be improved by creating better links between the reasons for crime and the resulting consequences, and discussing the topic more holistically.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many parts of world, children and teenagers are committing more crimes. what are the causes? how should these young criminals to be punished?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. others ,however,believe that school is the palce to learn this. discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people think that children should be raised by all the family members (eg: uncle, aunt and grandparents) rather than only parents. Give your opinion.

Some say that news has no connection with most people’s life and it is waste of time for most of us to read newspaper and watch television news programs. Agree or disagree?

Crime rates among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries. Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions

The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweigh is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweigh people? How can this problem be solved?