IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness

#happiness #life #factors
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true that
happiness
 is an essential part of human
life
 and provides
people
 with satisfaction and mental joy.
However
, the definition of
happiness
 is unclear since individuals have their own understanding and viewpoints on it. We should realize that individuals have different
life
 experiences, causing them to have different definitions of
happiness
. For the poor, having delicious food and a comfortable place to live makes them happy. These simple things,
however
, do not attract wealthy
people
 and
thus
 cannot bring
happiness
 to them. For a teenager, school
life
 is always connected with stress, behaviour limitation, and endless study, which cannot result in
happiness
. But for those who work in companies and should pay for householding expenditures, they probably recall their campus
life
 and consider
this
 period to be happy.
Therefore
, to give a certain definition of
happiness
 is difficult. Regardless of varying definitions of
happiness
, how to achieve
happiness
 is regular and not hard. The most important factor in obtaining
happiness
 is that
people
 should figure out what they actually need. For poor
people
, they require basic living resources
while
 the wealthy need inner satisfaction and business achievement. When we clear requirements, we can fulfil them and
thus
 become happy.
Besides
, there is a common sense that
people
 always feel happy from others' appreciation. When we help
people
 to solve their problems, they will appreciate our behaviour, which makes us to be satisfied and happy. In conclusion,
although
 the definition of
happiness
 varies, everyone can be happy by satisfying self-requirement and helping others.
Submitted by 609553855 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

introduction conclusion present
Ensure the introduction leads smoothly into the body paragraphs, establishing a clear position that is maintained throughout the essay.
logical structure
Structure the essay with clear paragraphing, including a variety of linking words and phrases to ensure a smooth flow between ideas.
supported main points
Develop ideas fully with examples that are completely relevant to the task and add substantial support to main points.
complete response
Fully address all parts of the task, ensuring that explanations are thorough and directly related to the questions posed.
clear comprehensive ideas
Strive for clarity in presenting ideas, with comprehensive explanations that enhance understanding of the topic.
relevant specific examples
Use a variety of relevant, specific examples that effectively support your points and contribute significantly to the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: