The charts below show the average temperatures in 12 months in three cities and how many hours of sunshine these cities have in a year.

The charts below show the average temperatures in 12 months in three cities and how many hours of sunshine these cities have in a year.
The line chart illustrates the average
temperature
in three different
cities
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
London
, New
York
, and Sydney in 12 months. The table
also
illustrates the total
hours
of sunshine in three different
cities
for one
year
. In April, Sydney experienced a downfall in the
temperature
until July it reached just over 15
degrees
and
this
marked the lowest point for one whole
year
. Meanwhile, Both
London
and New
York
are experiencing an upward trend with the
temperature
keep rising from January until July. In July, both
cities
are reaching
Wrong verb form
reached
show examples
the highest degree of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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temperature
, with
London
over
Change preposition
at over
show examples
20
degrees
and New
York
almost
Change preposition
at almost
show examples
30
degrees
.
However
, from July to December, both
cities
' temperatures get lower and eventually, New
York
Change noun form
York's
show examples
temperature
is just 5
degrees
in December which is the lowest among the others. Not only New
York
but
London
also
faces cool weather with just almost 10
degrees
at the end
of the
year
.
In contrast
,
Sydneys'
Change noun form
Sydney's
Sydneys'
show examples
temperature
rose sharply and by the end of the
year
, the
temperature
had
rose
Change the verb form
risen
show examples
until
Change preposition
to
show examples
25
degrees
. The total sunshine that New
York
receives is 2,535
hours
which is the highest compared to other
cities
. Less than 62
hours
of sunlight is received by people who live in Sydney.
In contrast
, there is a 1,355-hour difference between
London
and New
York
which means that people in
London
receive less than 1,355
hours
of
sun light
Correct your spelling
sunlight
show examples
compared to New Yorkers.
Submitted by lavenia34808 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, in contrast".
Vocabulary: Replace the words temperature, cities, london, york, hours, year, degrees with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "illustrates" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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