In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?
In recent times,
children
have set many aims and have been trying to achieve them. Pupils who are given the message that trying hard can result in accomplishment. This
statement have
Change the verb form
has
the
advantages and Correct article usage
apply
the
disadvantages for Correct article usage
apply
children
. First of all, children
who received this
quote are feeling motivative
and can reach Replace the word
motivated
the
goal, whilst they might feel Change the word
their
pressure
and depress
.
Replace the word
depression
This
message can lead children
to gain motivation to do something and lead to achievement. When they received
Wrong verb form
receive
this
message, they will feel motivated and will be focus
Wrong verb form
focused
about
the goal. Change preposition
on
For example
, children
in Thailand received some quotes from teachers to be focus
on Change the verb form
focus
examination
which Fix the agreement mistake
examinations
involve
Change the verb form
involves
children
to read
more books in order to have a better Change the verb form
reading
grade
to proud Fix the agreement mistake
grades
their
Change preposition
of their
family
. Fix the agreement mistake
families
This
achievement can result in happiness of
ourselves and Change preposition
for
families
.
Correct pronoun usage
our families
However
, sometimes children
may feel pressure
and may lead to depression. When they focus on the aim that they want to achieve, they will feel pressure
and worry whether they can accomplish or
not. Correct pronoun usage
it or
For instance
, the
recent study has shown that Korean youngsters who have Correct article usage
a
an
crucial examination for entering the university are Change the article
a
in stress
because their family force them to have Change preposition
stressed
a good scores
, if they have a low grade they will Correct the article-noun agreement
a good score
good scores
have a punishment
. Verb problem
be punished
This
problem lead
to depression Change the verb form
leads
of
youngsters which Change preposition
in
continue
to increase Correct subject-verb agreement
continues
in
these days.
Change preposition
apply
To conclude
, children
who received the quote about trying hard are getting the advantages of motivation and accomplishment, while
some says that this
result in pressure
and depression of
pupils.Change preposition
in
Submitted by fah on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear introduction, an organized body with distinct paragraphs for each point, and a clear conclusion that summarizes the main ideas.
task achievement
Develop main points more fully with specific examples and explanations to support each advantage and disadvantage mentioned.
task achievement
Provide a more balanced view by dedicating equal time to discussing both advantages and disadvantages with corresponding examples and analysis.
task achievement
Watch out for grammatical errors, as consistent mistakes can detract significantly from the clarity of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on your vocabulary. Aim to use precise vocabulary suited for the academic setting of the IELTS exam.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...