The two diagrams below describe changes to a museum's floor plan between 2008 and 2012.

The two diagrams below describe changes to a museum's floor plan between 2008 and 2012.
The diagram compares the development of a museum from 2008 to 2012. The most noticeable changes are the increases in the number of floors and facilities throughout the year and the replacement of stairs with a lift. In 2008, a pathway connected to the museum entrance led to a reception right beside a reading
room
. At one level below, a staircase was spotted in between a changing
room
and a store.
Furthermore
, a gallery was located
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the west side of the building. After the renovation in 2012, the location and sizes of the path, gallery, shop, and reading
room
remained constant.
However
, the stairs were removed and a lift that climbs to 4th floor was added.
Furthermore
, the museum entry became a hallway and the reception was rebuilt to reduce its size and
merged
Wrong verb form
merge
show examples
with
cloakroom
Correct article usage
the cloakroom
show examples
. In the east of the ground floor, the old cloakroom was replaced by a playground. On the third floor, an outdoor
terace
Correct your spelling
terrace
was on the left of a new restaurant and a self-service cafe was situated next to the lift.
In contrast
, the highest level occupied a small area, it had an exhibition
room
which was one-third the size of other floors.
Submitted by dharyuschen12 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore".
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words room with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Floor plan
  • Renovation
  • Expansion
  • Spatial distribution
  • Accessibility
  • Visitor experience
  • Exhibit
  • Gallery
  • Interactive displays
  • Historical artifacts
  • Educational facilities
  • Visitor amenities
  • Foot traffic
  • Layout alteration
  • Modernize
  • Gift shop
  • Cafeteria
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