Wild animals have no place in the 21st century, so protecting them is a waste of resources. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Wild creatures are facing great danger nowadays and raise
people
's more attention than ever before.
While
some
people
may consider wildlife protection as meaningless, I would argue that protecting wild species will bring us long-term benefits. On the one hand, I agree that protecting endangered
wildlifes
Correct your spelling
wildlife
demands a great deal of resources.
First,
there will be more wild animal zoos, which can gather all the endangered
animals
.
However
, it
also
means massive budgets
of
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for
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enough food resources and technical talents, which will usually bring back
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
few feedbacks
Fix the agreement mistake
little feedback
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.
Second,
it is unrealistic to seek out all the rare creatures and collect them together.
On the other hand
, I believe that there are various benefits derived from wild
animals
' protection.
First,
it will help boost the diversity of wild creatures, which
in
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to
show examples
some extent will contribute to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ecological studies. By analyzing the wild
animals
, ecologists can help develop the ecosystem.
In addition
, protecting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wild
animals
can
also
help the ecology maintain a balance. The food chain will be damaged if one of its critical
component
Change to a plural noun
components
show examples
is extinct.
Thus
, by providing
safeguard
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safeguards
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to mammals,
people
can
prevent
Verb problem
protect
show examples
their environment from danger. In conclusion, I suggest that
people
should make
their
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an
show examples
efforts
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effort
show examples
to protect endangered
animals
.
Submitted by 609553855 on

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introduction conclusion present
While the essay's structure includes an introduction and conclusion, stronger closing arguments could enhance its impact. Clearly restate the main thesis and briefly summarize key points to reinforce the stance taken.
logical structure
The essay generally follows a logical order, but transitions between points could be smoother. Utilize linking phrases effectively to guide the reader from one idea to the next without abrupt shifts, ensuring a cohesive reading experience.
supported main points
The essay supports its main points; however, the arguments would be strengthened by providing more specific examples and evidence to illustrate the benefits and challenges of wildlife protection.
complete response
The response adequately discusses both sides of the issue and presents a clear opinion, but greater exploration of the topic would provide a more complete response.
clear comprehensive ideas
The essay introduces relevant ideas about the costs and benefits of wildlife protection. However, to enhance clarity, state ideas more comprehensively by expanding on the analysis of each argument presented.
relevant specific examples
Comparison of the arguments lacks specificity. Include more detailed and concrete examples to support the views on wildlife protection. Real-world instances or statistics would add weight to the arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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