Some people believe that technology has made our lives more complicated and the solution is to live a simple life without technology. Agree or disagree?

#people #technology #lives #life

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Some

people

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believe that

technology

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has made

people

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live

Replace the word

lives

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more complicated. They think the best solution for

this

Linking Words

problem is to choose a simple

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life-style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

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by having

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life

Add an article

a life

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without

technology

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This

Linking Words

essay agrees that

technology

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must not be applied

for

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show examples

all

life

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aspects as it takes

time

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Firstly

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

sophisticated stuff like

technology

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takes

much

Correct quantifier usage

a lot of

show examples

time

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when

people

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need to get

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

food

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This

Linking Words

problem can be seen

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show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

public

service

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services

show examples

restaurant

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restaurants

show examples

Nowdays

Correct the word

Nowadays

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, many resto employers

using

Wrong verb form

use

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order

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application

Fix the agreement mistake

applications

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and QR

code

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codes

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in their

bussines

Correct your spelling

business

People

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need to use their

Fix the agreement mistake

phones

show examples

phone

Fix the agreement mistake

phones

show examples

order

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Correct article usage

apply

show examples

the

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apply

show examples

menus through

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restaurants

show examples

Fix the agreement mistake

restaurant'

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restaurants'

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restaurants

show examples

Fix the agreement mistake

applications

show examples

application

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applications

show examples

. They have to download the application on Playstore,

then

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and fill

the

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out the

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form. After

registrating

Correct your spelling

registering

, they

finnaly

Correct your spelling

finally

can

order

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the

food

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This

Linking Words

amazing step can be done by some

people

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who

has

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have

show examples

internet and a sophisticated phone.

However

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, if the

people

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this

Linking Words

situation do not have the internet, they need to get the internet in

order

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to get the

food

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Moreover

Linking Words

, the buyer

have

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has

show examples

to pay the bill with e-money by scanning

Correct article usage

a QR

show examples

code as most entrepreneurs encourage

people

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Verb problem

use

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less cash. For some

people

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it just

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

the harder to get what they need even though

the

Correct your spelling

they

show examples

have enough money in their wallet to pay the bill. It means

this

Linking Words

situation

does

Verb problem

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not

practicall

Correct your spelling

practical

practically

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for

show examples

all

people

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Secondly

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, in

Indonesia

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Indonesia's

show examples

education sector, all teachers have to use

PMM

Correct article usage

the PMM

show examples

platform to do their online training. It sounds good, but the teachers have to spend much

time

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and

ennergy

Correct your spelling

energy

to do their new responsible as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

educators. In bad situations, they still have to do their work

although

Linking Words

the office hour is over. The teachers open their

laptop

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laptops

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in their

home

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homes

show examples

to do their online training,

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

however,

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it decreases their quality

time

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with their

fammily

Correct your spelling

family

that is

Linking Words

really more important than online training.

This

Linking Words

situations

Fix the agreement mistake

situation

show examples

happen

Correct subject-verb agreement

happens

show examples

when

technology

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is more used. Even though

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

we all know that

technology

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has given many things to

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people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

Use synonyms

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

we do not always need sophisticated tools to have a good

life

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. in conclusion, I agree that for these cases we do not need to use

technology

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for ordering the

food

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, paying bills, and teacher training online. We just need

Correct article usage

a classsical

show examples

classsical

Correct your spelling

classical

way to do

these thing

Change the determiner

this thing

these things

show examples

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Fri Nov 24 2023

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task achievement

Ensure that the introduction clearly states your position on the topic. Avoid general statements without a clear thesis.

task achievement

Provide a broader range of relevant examples to support your arguments. This will help demonstrate deeper understanding and insight.

coherence cohesion

Work on creating smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. This will help the essay flow more naturally and coherently.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that main points are developed with clear explanations and that each paragraph contains one central idea that is expanded upon.

coherence cohesion

Check for grammatical accuracy and correct usage of vocabulary. This is crucial for the clarity of your ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
55
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

379 words

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Some people believe that technology has made our lives more complicated and the solution is to live a simple life without technology. Agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowaways, more teenagers want to become famous actors or singers. Why do you think this is happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

In many workplaces, online communication is getting more common than meeting face to face. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, the average weight of people is increasing, and their level of health and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Economic progress is often used to measure a country’s success. However, some people believe that other factors are more important. What other factors should also be considered when measuring a country’s success? Which one do you think is the most important?