2)The two pie charts below show total world energy consuption and electiricity generation for last year
The following two diagrams give a distribution of world
energy
input and the production of electrical energy
in the previous year at
Change preposition
apply
all
.
It is immediately noticeable, that the most preferable methods of Correct determiner usage
apply
energy
consumption were more traditional products such
as coal and oil, and accounted for almost 24 and 34 percent
respectively. Change the spelling
per cent
Secondly
, just over the fifth part of usage was provided with gas which was almost equal to total electricity generation. Based on the pie chart, it is obvious that the energy
received by nuclear was 6.5 percent
Change the spelling
per cent
while
biomass was 10.6 percent
. Hydro stations are relatively less Change the spelling
per cent
energy demanding
.
Add a hyphen
energy-demanding
According to
the second pie chart, electric power manufacture supplying
by coal was approximately a fourth out of ten .The electricity received from hydro and atomic stations was around 16 Wrong verb form
supplied
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
while
the energy
power generated by gas accounted for almost 20 percent
. Change the spelling
per cent
In addition
, other types of sources produced and consumed a minimal amount of these indicators.
Overall
, it is clear that
combustible renewables and waste were the most popular in energy
usage while
the
coal Correct article usage
apply
also
was more
preferable in electricity generation.Correct quantifier usage
apply
Submitted by abdurahimov03 on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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