Some people think it is one of the best ways to solve the environmental problems by increasing the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Recent years have witnessed
the
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apply
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spectacular development in
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the enconomy
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enconomy
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economy
, resulting in the number of vehicles
increased
Wrong verb form
increasing
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. Some
people
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claim that
due to
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this
Linking Words
increasing trend, the environment is
serious
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seriously
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polluted and the sole solution to tackle
this
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problem is
make
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to make
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the
cost
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of
fuel
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for vehicles
increased
Wrong verb form
increase
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.
Overall
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, I tend to disagree with
this
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view. It is important to first acknowledge that with the increased
cost
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of
fuel
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, that means more
people
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cannot afford it any more. If
people
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faced
Wrong verb form
face
show examples
such
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a problem, they will reduce the desire and frequency of driving.
Thus
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, it can
direct
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directly
show examples
reduce traffic jams and carbon emissions. Having
such
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ways,
the
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apply
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air pollution might
be
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apply
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largely
declined
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decline
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.
This
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is certainly a good idea.
In addition
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, because of the higher
fuel
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cost
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, more
people
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might
perfer
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prefer
to buy electric cars
instead
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of petrol cars or
the
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apply
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others
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other
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vehicles. It is a better way to
slove
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solve
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the environmental problems from the fundamental aspects. Having said that, I still believe that increasing the
cost
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of
fuel
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is not the best way to tackle
the
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apply
show examples
environmental problems. There
is
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are
show examples
some potential risks behind
this
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view.
Frirstly
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Firstly
, when the
cost
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of
the
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apply
show examples
fuel
Use synonyms
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
higher, few
people
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will not take buying a private car or taking a bus into their consideration when they travel to another place,
instead
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of riding a bike or walking. By
people
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choosing these ways, it is
bond
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bound
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to affect
economy
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economic
show examples
development and social prosperity seriously. 结尾:In conclusion,
while
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/
although
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+ 让步观点, it is my opinion that+ 立论观点 It is worth emphasising that the government... advantages /disadvantages
Submitted by xueyinggao2023 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay has an identifiable structure, but it lacks clear transitions between ideas, which can confuse the reader. There should be better linking phrases and topic sentences that clearly indicate the main idea of each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are not effectively presented. The conclusion is notably missing, which is essential for a complete essay. Remember to provide a complete essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
While each paragraph presents a main idea, these points need to be further supported with examples and explanations to strengthen the argument. Use concrete examples or data where possible to support your points.
task achievement
The essay somewhat addresses the topic, but the task response is not fully developed. Ensure to provide a clear stance throughout the essay and expand on your ideas with a detailed argument and relevant examples to fully answer the question.
task achievement
The ideas presented are relevant but not comprehensive. Aim to provide in-depth exploration of the ideas, which can be achieved by explaining and exemplifying the points in greater detail.
task achievement
Specific examples that are directly relevant to the environmental issues and the solution proposed are lacking. Include more focused, relevant examples to substantiate your arguments about the impact on the environment and the economy.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental sustainability
  • renewable energy
  • fossil fuels
  • public transportation
  • carbon footprint
  • economic incentives
  • alternative energy vehicles
  • fuel-efficient
  • government subsidies
  • economic disparity
  • urban planning
  • rural infrastructure
  • sustainable development
  • carbon tax
  • green technology
  • demand elasticity
  • energy conservation
  • climate change mitigation
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