Some people think it is one of the best ways to solve the environmental problems by increasing the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Recent years have witnessed
the
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apply
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spectacular development in
Correct article usage
the enconomy
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enconomy
Correct your spelling
economy
, resulting in the number of vehicles
increased
Wrong verb form
increasing
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. Some
people
claim that
due to
this
increasing trend, the environment is
serious
Change the word
seriously
show examples
polluted and the sole solution to tackle
this
problem is
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
show examples
the
cost
of
fuel
for vehicles
increased
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
.
Overall
, I tend to disagree with
this
view. It is important to first acknowledge that with the increased
cost
of
fuel
, that means more
people
cannot afford it any more. If
people
faced
Wrong verb form
face
show examples
such
a problem, they will reduce the desire and frequency of driving.
Thus
, it can
direct
Replace the word
directly
show examples
reduce traffic jams and carbon emissions. Having
such
ways,
the
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apply
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air pollution might
be
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apply
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largely
declined
Wrong verb form
decline
show examples
.
This
is certainly a good idea.
In addition
, because of the higher
fuel
cost
, more
people
might
perfer
Correct your spelling
prefer
to buy electric cars
instead
of petrol cars or
the
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apply
show examples
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
vehicles. It is a better way to
slove
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solve
show examples
the environmental problems from the fundamental aspects. Having said that, I still believe that increasing the
cost
of
fuel
is not the best way to tackle
the
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apply
show examples
environmental problems. There
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
some potential risks behind
this
view.
Frirstly
Correct your spelling
Firstly
, when the
cost
of
the
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apply
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fuel
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
higher, few
people
will not take buying a private car or taking a bus into their consideration when they travel to another place,
instead
of riding a bike or walking. By
people
choosing these ways, it is
bond
Correct your spelling
bound
show examples
to affect
economy
Replace the word
economic
show examples
development and social prosperity seriously. 结尾:In conclusion,
while
/
although
+ 让步观点, it is my opinion that+ 立论观点 It is worth emphasising that the government... advantages /disadvantages
Submitted by xueyinggao2023 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay has an identifiable structure, but it lacks clear transitions between ideas, which can confuse the reader. There should be better linking phrases and topic sentences that clearly indicate the main idea of each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are not effectively presented. The conclusion is notably missing, which is essential for a complete essay. Remember to provide a complete essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
While each paragraph presents a main idea, these points need to be further supported with examples and explanations to strengthen the argument. Use concrete examples or data where possible to support your points.
task achievement
The essay somewhat addresses the topic, but the task response is not fully developed. Ensure to provide a clear stance throughout the essay and expand on your ideas with a detailed argument and relevant examples to fully answer the question.
task achievement
The ideas presented are relevant but not comprehensive. Aim to provide in-depth exploration of the ideas, which can be achieved by explaining and exemplifying the points in greater detail.
task achievement
Specific examples that are directly relevant to the environmental issues and the solution proposed are lacking. Include more focused, relevant examples to substantiate your arguments about the impact on the environment and the economy.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental sustainability
  • renewable energy
  • fossil fuels
  • public transportation
  • carbon footprint
  • economic incentives
  • alternative energy vehicles
  • fuel-efficient
  • government subsidies
  • economic disparity
  • urban planning
  • rural infrastructure
  • sustainable development
  • carbon tax
  • green technology
  • demand elasticity
  • energy conservation
  • climate change mitigation
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