Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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In recent years, many individuals with health problems have tried to heal the disease by themselves by using

medicines

Use synonyms

and treatments

instead

Linking Words

of going to an expert. I believe that it is a negative development for humans because it can make the situation worse and it can cause

depression

Use synonyms

in some people. Some

medicines

Use synonyms

can affect the sickness badly because some people do not know which medication to use to make themselves feel better.

Therefore

Linking Words

, they feel more sick than ever and feel disappointed because they were sure that they would heal.

For example

Linking Words

, in the United States

medicines

Use synonyms

are sold in grocery stores because the majority of citizens do not want to go to a doctor because it costs too much.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, they purchase

medicines

Use synonyms

to help themselves.

However

Linking Words

, they do not see any signs of healing and they get disappointed because they are sure that they can heal. Many individuals are dealing with

depression

Use synonyms

because they are disappointed with the medicine and treatment results. So, they tend to take more medication because they are sure that it will make them feel better.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the risk of death can appear.

For instance

Linking Words

, in Germany, there are a lot of citizens who have taken more doses of medication than they should be dealing with

depression

Use synonyms

because they are not happy with the results and the majority die because they get overdosed. In conclusion, people who try to heal themselves with treatments make the healing process more complicated and it can cause mental health problems

such

Linking Words

depression

Use synonyms

. I believe that the person who deals with sickness should take advice from a doctor to prevent negative developments.

mcqueensever Wed Jan 29 2025

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coherence cohesion

Try to use a wider range of cohesive devices to improve the flow between ideas. Consider using linking words like "furthermore," "in addition," etc., more consistently throughout your essay.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to support your points. While examples from the United States and Germany are relevant, more detailed and varied instances could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Well-structured introduction and conclusion, clearly stating your opinion and summarizing your arguments effectively.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the prompt directly and provides a clear opinion on the issue of alternative medicines and treatments.

task achievement

The main ideas are communicated clearly, with logical reasoning behind your opinion.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
treatments
positive development
negative development
health problems
usual doctor
access
personalized approach
holistic well-being
lack of regulation
evidence-based research
proper medical treatment

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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Children find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to their studies in school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?

The government should sometimes infringe on people's freedom for the security of society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?