In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by fast food. This has a negative impact on families, individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fast
food
is quite popular
among
Change preposition
in
show examples
the world,
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
a result, conventional cuisine
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
replaced by fast
food
in many nations.
This
trend has an adverse effect on
society
, families and
individuals
. I strongly agree with
this
statement and
this
essay will discuss it briefly for the following reasons.
To begin
with, traditional
foods
are become
Change to the active voice
become
have become
show examples
exist by fast
foods
in many nations, especially western countries
due to
busy life. Even though, fast
foods
should
give
Verb problem
cause
show examples
enormous
health
issues
such
as heart stroke and obesity.
This
certainly affects
people
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people's
show examples
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
and life expectancy,
consequently
,
heart
Correct article usage
the heart
show examples
attack ratio
is
Verb problem
has
show examples
increased dramatically in recent days.
For example
, a recent report Time of India said that
,
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apply
show examples
many
adults
Change noun form
adults'
adult's
show examples
death
ratio is being
Wrong verb form
rates have
show examples
increased after
covid
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
due to
people
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
eaten many fast
food
items during the
corona
Correct your spelling
coronavirus
show examples
period of time,
they
Correct word choice
and they
show examples
ordered easily from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online
food
delivery companies.
Furthermore
, home
foods
are always good for
health
instead
of
junk
foods
because fast
foods
have more adverse like essence for taste, and
chemical
Fix the agreement mistake
chemicals
show examples
for preservation.
This
should affect
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
health
, not only
individuals
'
health
but
also
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Change noun form
society's
show examples
.
For instance
, in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
folks have more
health
issues
due to
eating more
junk
foods
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
regular
Correct article usage
a regular
show examples
basis.
Hence
, replacing traditional cuisine
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
junk
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
can bring enormous
health
trouble to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
families,
individuals
and
society
.
To conclude
, replacing traditional
foods
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
junk
foods
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
more
health
issues
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays around the world and
this
trend has
negative
Add an article
a negative
show examples
impact on
individuals
, families and
society
.
Therefore
, I strongly agree with
this
statement in the above-mentioned details. I hope
people
should change their eating habits from
junk
foods
to healthy
foods
like salad.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure you have a clear structure by dividing your essay into clear paragraphs: introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have its own main point that ties back into the overall thesis of the essay. Transitional words or phrases should be used to guide the reader through the arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but could be enhanced by clearly restating your thesis and summarizing your main points. Avoid introducing new arguments or examples in your conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Your main points need to be more clearly developed. Use specific examples and details to support each of your arguments. You should also ensure that these points are clearly explained and linked to the thesis statement of the essay.
task achievement
While you have addressed the task, you should work on fully developing your response to all parts of the prompt. It's important to present clear, comprehensive ideas and to express them in fully developed paragraphs. Avoid generalizations and ensure that your argument is coherent and thoroughly explained.
task achievement
While you offered some relevant examples, make sure that the examples you use are specific and clearly linked to the point you're making. They need to convincingly support your argument and be fully elaborated upon within the essay.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Impact
  • Nutritious
  • Cultural heritage
  • Identity
  • Economic implications
  • Locally sourced
  • Social cohesion
  • Environmental degradation
  • Obesity
  • Heart diseases
  • Diabetes
  • Cultural transmission
  • Convenience
  • Traditional dishes
  • Biodiversity
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