Some people believe that old buildings should be replaced with more modern ones. Other people argue that we should protect old buildings because they have special value. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The necessity of preserving old
buildings
is widely debated. Some maintain that they are irreplaceable
due to
their sentimental value to local citizens. Contrastingly, others advocate that replacements are vital to
endure
Correct your spelling
ensure
show examples
safety
. From my perspective, I espouse the latter as
safety
comes first in
constructions
Fix the agreement mistake
construction
show examples
. The replacement of old
buildings
causes strong backlash among local residents as they have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sentimental value. These
buildings
have been integral parts of their lives and, when local
people
look at them, it rekindles thousands of memories from one’s childhood to adulthood. Under
such
circumstances, it is understandable that demolishing these
buildings
is regarded as depriving one’s memories.
For example
, some articles introduced that urban regeneration in Tokyo triggered severe depression among a group of local citizens. They claimed that they felt isolated in their town, as it bore little resemblance to what they had been.
On the other hand
, periodical replacements are necessary in terms of
safety
.
Long standing
Add a hyphen
Long-standing
show examples
buildings
cannot bear comparison with modern ones in durability. Even if they are properly maintained,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
still cannot bridge the gap.
This
is because modern
buildings
are designed to meet the rigorous standard of construction and are made of advanced materials, particularly at their foundations. To illustrate
this
, the majority of Japanese
people
eschew living in apartments that were constructed more than three decades ago, as they carry
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
greater risk of fatal injuries in case an earthquake happens. Indeed, old towns reported a substantial number of deceased
people
in the Great Kanto Earthquake of 1923. To summarize, it is understandable that replacements of old architecture are disappointing to local citizens.
Nevertheless
,
people
must accept it to ensure
safety
as I believe nothing can be prioritized over
safety
.
Submitted by old.cat.respect on

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coherence cohesion
To enhance the logical structure of your essay, make sure to consistently use clear transition words and phrases to guide your reader from one idea to the next. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph flows logically from the previous one and contributes to the overall argument of the essay.
coherence cohesion
An effective introduction and conclusion are essential for a high-scoring IELTS essay. Your introduction should clearly address the topic and present a clear thesis statement. In the conclusion, aim to summarise your main points succinctly and restate your thesis in light of the arguments discussed.
coherence cohesion
To support your main points, provide more concrete examples and evidence. Personal anecdotes or hypothetical scenarios can be persuasive but strive to supplement them with factual evidence or statistical data where possible.
task achievement
You provided a response to the task with a clear opinion. However, to achieve a higher band, expand on your main ideas by fully developing each argument presented. Examine both views more evenly and with greater depth to meet the requirements of the task more comprehensively.
task achievement
You have presented ideas related to the topic, but to enhance clarity and comprehensiveness, ensure each paragraph contains a central idea that is fully explained and developed. Aim for each idea to clearly contribute to the overall argument or opinion you are presenting.
task achievement
Relevant and specific examples strengthen an IELTS essay and demonstrate a higher level of task achievement. Include more specific examples and case studies, and ensure they directly support the points you're making in relation to the topic.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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