Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
I think that choosing
alternative
medicine
and treatment
is a negative thing. Because alternative
medicine
and treatment
relies
on feelings, not based on the data. Change the verb form
rely
Alternative
doctors cannot ensure that the alternative
treatment
given to someone will be gradual, what impact it will have, save or not, and other important things. And sometimes
the Correct word choice
Sometimes
alternative
medicine
and treatment
it’s not clear, it
Correct word choice
whether it
was
halal or not (Wrong verb form
is
Cause
in Correct your spelling
Because
islam
, the people aren’t drinking or eating a haram thing). Change the capitalization
Islam
Although
sometimes some Correct word choice
However
alternative
treatments are more effective (like Ruqyah medicine
in islam
method, poison Change the capitalization
Islam
treatment
from alternative
doctor
, and others).
If visiting the usual Fix the agreement mistake
doctors
doctor
, they will know more about the patient's habits when experiencing illness (based on data from past visits). The medicines and treatment
given Fix the agreement mistake
treatments
from
the Change preposition
by
doctor
have also
been verified to cure patients (based on BPOM and Halal label). And it will be gradual, he will know what impact it will get, save or not, and other important things.
According to
Professor Dr. Albert Azeen Mpd. Sd., “Capitalize word
Routine
routine
Capitalize word
Routine
treatment
carried out by the doctor
you usually visited will provide a solution for sustainable recovery from the disease”, he said when he was Change preposition
at
in
the International Doctors Meeting (IDM) at Change preposition
at
Correct article usage
the University
University
of London. Rather than Correct article usage
the University
alternative
treatments which are sometimes less certain about the results of the treatment
carried out.
So, in my opinion, treatment
from the doctor
you usually visit is better than alternative
treatment
. Because it will be gradual, the doctor
will know what impact it will get
, Verb problem
have
save
or not, and other important things. Replace the word
safe
Then
alternative
medicine
and treatment
, which relies on feelings, not based on the data.Submitted by igbalalfariezy on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a concise conclusion. Each paragraph should serve a distinct purpose with a central idea that is expanded upon with supporting details.
coherence cohesion
Develop logical connections and transitions between sentences and paragraphs to guide the reader smoothly through your arguments. Avoid abrupt shifts in topic and ensure each sentence contributes to the overall cohesion of the text.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task, ensuring you respond to the prompt fully. Your opinion on whether the development is positive or negative should be clear throughout the essay, supported by relevant arguments and examples.
task achievement
Elaborate your ideas using clear and comprehensive language. Avoid vague statements and ensure that your arguments include detailed explanations and specific examples where appropriate.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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