IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

It is better to have one true friend than all the acquaintances in the world. Do you agree or disagee with this statement.

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Having
one
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 genuine
friend
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 is better than making all the relations in
this
Linking Words
 universe.
However
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, I completely disagree with
this
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 statement because having more than just
one
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 best
friend
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 is more valuable and the step is started by acquaintanceship among many
people
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 around us because more true
friends
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 are more beneficial.
To begin
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 with, the quantity and quality of friendship is really essential for some
people
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. It means that they prefer to make relationships with more individuals and are happy to find meaningful friendships among more than
one
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 person.
For instance
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, from children to
adults
Add a comma
adults,
show examples
people
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 can meet many different
people
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, so they can start to know each other and continue to make more true
friends
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.
Furthermore
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, another reason is that having more than
one
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 best
friend
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 brings more positive impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
people
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’s lives. They not only rely on
one
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 close
friend
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 but
also
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 can count on more of their best
friends
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.
For example
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, when they experience bad things and
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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need support from their
friends
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, they can contact some of their best
friends
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 to help them and if
one
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 of their best
friends
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 is busy there is still another
one
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 to depend on.
To sum up
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, it is a good choice to have more than
one
Use synonyms
 soul mate in life. We can spend our lifetime
to start
Verb problem
apply
show examples
making true
friendship
Fix the agreement mistake
friendships
show examples
 with a deep relationship because it leads to positive influence
such
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 as becoming the support system and helping each other in need.

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Coherence and Cohesion
To improve your score, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea, which is developed and not just listed. Use a range of cohesive devices appropriately and ensure paragraphs flow smoothly with logical progression.
Task Achievement
Develop your arguments further by providing more specific examples and supporting details. While you've presented a view and relevant examples, they need to be more specific to illustrate the points more effectively. Make sure all parts of the task are addressed equally and illustrate your points fully to satisfy the requirements of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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