It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In these
Change preposition
These
show examples
days, taking risks for
both
professional and personal lives is
controversial
Add an article
a controversial
show examples
issue. Some
people
argue about its advantages
while
others contest the disadvantages. In
this
essay, allow me to discuss
both
views and draw my conclusion based on my observations. There is no doubt that
people
find
this
situation a disadvantage because of insecurity, instability, and the consequences of the risk. Many studies show that many
people
, especially in
this
rapidly changing society and high social standards feel unsafe to risk
both
their personal and professional lives. Many experienced discomfort, financial issues, and even relationship rivalries because of being too ambitious to take chances. More than half of the population in
this
research failed to accomplish their target goals
due to
personal issues.
Thus
, many experts do not
advice
Replace the word
advise
show examples
people
to enter
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
show examples
. Despite all the disadvantages, many believe that
such
risk can be helpful, beneficial, and educational. Many testimonials of
people
who challenged themselves to try something new, explore possibilities, and broaden their horizons became more dependable, reliable, and competitive. They mentioned how the situation helped them to become better versions of themselves. They learned how to become flexible and how to improve their abilities as they were tested over time.
As a result
, they learned a lot and are able to offer more than expected. In conclusion,
both
have strong points.
However
, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Submitted by dayanarobancho on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should outline the key points to be discussed, the body should delve into these points with clear examples and reasoning, and the conclusion should summarize the main ideas.
coherence cohesion
The body paragraphs should have a clear central topic each and should be logically ordered to ensure the reader can follow the progression of the argument without difficulty.
coherence cohesion
Aim to improve paragraphing by using a range of cohesive devices effectively. This includes transition words and phrases that show the relationship between paragraphs and ideas within paragraphs.
task achievement
Be sure to fully address the task by presenting a clear position throughout the response. While both sides of the argument should be presented, the conclusion must clearly indicate which side is favored.
task achievement
Develop main ideas with more detailed and specific examples. Rather than mentioning general situations or citing vague research, include concrete examples to illustrate points.
task achievement
Ensure that the main ideas are not only listed but are explored in depth. Narrow down on specific details to demonstrate a full understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Opportunities
  • Growth
  • Innovation
  • Challenges
  • Self-discovery
  • Resilience
  • Uncertainty
  • Consequences
  • Calculated risks
  • Stagnation
  • Regret
  • Comfort zone
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Adventurous spirit
  • Thriving
  • Failure
  • Mitigate
  • Reap the rewards
What to do next:
Look at other essays: