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Writing Samples
Band 6

Crime rates have been increasing in many cities around the world. What are the key problems contributing to this rise in crime, and what solutions can be implemented to tackle these issues?

Needless to say,
crime
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 is one of the most significant issues in the world, and its rate is increasing day by day, especially in urban
areas
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. There are several challenges contributing to
this
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 rise in
crime
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,
such
Linking Words
 as financial
problems
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 and poor educational backgrounds in society. In some ways,
this
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 matter can be tackled, including by providing additional job opportunities and promoting public programs. One of the primary
problems
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 is poverty and lower incomes in the population. It is evident that
people
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 are more prone to committing petty
crimes
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,
such
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 as robbery
,
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apply
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 when they face financial
problems
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.
Moreover
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, life is more difficult in urban
areas
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 than in other
areas
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;
therefore
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,
crime
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rates
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 increase in
cities
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 as
people
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 try to survive.
For example
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, in Azerbaijan, a preponderance of
people
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 confront these types of
problems
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 because of low salaries, and some of them commit
crimes
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 to get money, especially in the big
cities
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.
In addition
Linking Words
, poor educational backgrounds contribute to increasing
crime
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rates
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 in big
cities
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. The number of
people
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 is greater in rural
areas
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, and education is not accessible to everyone; so, the number of ignorant
people
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 rises. It is obvious that these types of individuals tend to be more criminal. With regard to solutions for
this
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 problem, increasing the number of job opportunities can address the main part of these challenges. When governments provide
people
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 with more jobs,
people
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 do not face
problems
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 related to money, and the rate of
thefts
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theft
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 dramatically decreases.
For instance
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, in European countries, there are many jobs for the population;
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is why
crime
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rates
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 are at the lowest level.
Furthermore
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, another viable option to combat
crime
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 is to promote public education programs. Society is less prone to criminal actions when its awareness rises about the detrimental impacts of
crimes
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.
This
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 method is extremely essential for
cities
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 because more individuals commit
crimes
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due to
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 a lack of knowledge about the effects of
crimes
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 on society and themselves. In conclusion,
crime
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rates
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 have been increasing in
cities
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due to
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 some
problems
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 related to financial and educational issues. There are some valid ways to solve these
problems
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,
such
Linking Words
 as increasing job availability and raising
people
Use synonyms
's awareness about the consequences of criminal situations.

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Task Achievement
Provide more detailed examples or statistics to strengthen your argument about crime rates and their causes. Additionally, consider addressing counterarguments or alternative views.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that your ideas flow smoothly from one point to another. Using more linking phrases could help clarify the connections between your arguments and increase coherence.
Task Achievement
You clearly identify key problems contributing to increased crime rates and propose viable solutions, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure of your essay is generally clear, with a logical progression of ideas from introduction to conclusion.
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