Cheaper food is now available because of greater use of fertilizers and improved machinery. This improved production, however, can be harmful to individuals and the community. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view? Discuss, including examples from your own knowledge and experience.

While
it is believed by some that cheaper feed is currently widely used on account of fertilizers and cutting-edge machinery,others claim these sorts of
meals
have detrimental impacts on public health and society.In
this
essay, my opinion will be illustrated
in addition
to some justifications to clarify my view. To commence with, organic cuisine is not as healthy as normal foodstuff.To illustrate
this
, take my country as a clear example
this
kind of food is broadly used because of its convenience to handle it and eat it.
However
,despite
this
, there are some negative consequences to these types of foods for both individuals
as well as
the community. Within a relatively short period of time, a significant number of people suffered from gastrointestinal diseases like diarrhoea and vomiting.
Accordingly
, a lot of the public is stuck in hospital corridors in order to get treatment.Not only that,but these
meals
contributed to some malnourished dilemmas like anaemia.
This
is because of a lack of basic ingredients like vitamins. So as to the given reasons,what the government has to do is ban these types of
meals
.
Therefore
,it seems to me that it is justified to prevent these foodstuffs in the markets. The other pattern can be seen in the third world nations, people who depend on fertilized food are in the majority which is extent caused by poverty. In these countries,the public does not have enough money in order to buy healthy
meals
,so they rely on these
meals
as a major source of nutrition.
Additionally
, some major countries depend on these kinds of
meals
as a primary source of income
as well as
foreign currency regardless of their drawbacks and consequences in the long run.
For example
,China. In spite of these, I am inclined to think neither because of the aforementioned reasons in the first paragraph. In a nutshell, through the analysis of
this
topic, it is predicted that
although
organic cooking is cheap and handy, it brings about drawbacks in the long run for both communities
in addition
to the public and
this
is because of the given clarifications.
Hence
, the authorities have to tackle
this
dilemma in the near future.
Submitted by nadeenelkenawy4425 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear logical structure, with ideas presented in a somewhat disjointed and confusing manner. Sentences are not well-connected, making the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay poor. The introduction and conclusion are present but are weak and do not adequately frame the essay. You should work to create a stronger thesis statement, use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph, and ensure that each paragraph logically flows to the next one. Consider using cohesive devices such as conjunctions and transitional phrases to better link your ideas.
task achievement
The essay does not fully respond to the task. You were asked to discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the view that improved production can be harmful. However, the essay does not develop a clear position, and the examples provided are not entirely relevant or well-explained. To improve, ensure that you directly address the question, develop a clear argument, and support your points with specific, relevant examples. The inclusion of personal examples and experiences should enhance your argument, not detract from it.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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