Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #art #children #school #waste #time

this

day and age,

children

are required to study a great deal of subjects at school.

Although

some believe that studying

art

is a waste of

time

for

children

at institutions, others support that it is mandatory for them to learn

art

. In

this

essay, I will examine both views and explain why I think it is necessary to include

art

education at school. There are two main reasons why a number of people think it was a waste of

time

Firstly

students

should spend their

time

on practical subjects

such

as sciences and languages. By doing so, they can sharpen their skills for future workplaces.

Secondly

, artworks are too complicated for

children

to understand. Most of the

students

find it difficult to interpret the symbolism of the post-impressionism paintings. Owing to a lack of life experience, they usually fail to integrate their viewpoints into the masterpieces. If they find it boring, it will only cost their invaluable

time

for nothing.

Whereas

it shows that learning

art

is hard and seems useless for kids, there are precise values that they can obtain through studying

art

. The most prominent one is understanding history. Thanks to collectors who preserved thousands of

art

pieces,

students

not only can experience what living in the Middle Ages looked like by looking at oil paintings, but

also

learn from others’ experiences and interpretations of wars, disasters, and historical events.

Moreover

, they can

also

improve self-awareness by knowing their own preferences. The more artwork they learn, the better self they will understand.

Art

is an abstract subject that people hold different views on whether it should be a mandatory subject for

children

to study. By carefully assessing both views, I wholeheartedly believe that

art

is an invaluable subject for

students

at school.

Submitted by sonyso on Wed Nov 29 2023

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Coherence & Cohesion

Maintain a consistent flow in your paragraphs by enhancing transitions and ensuring that each paragraph flows logically into the next. While your essay contains an introduction and a conclusion, the body paragraphs could benefit from clearer topic sentences and stronger concluding sentences that reinforce your main points.

Task Achievement

Provide more specific examples to effectively illustrate your points. Relevant examples not only support your ideas but also demonstrate your ability to apply abstract concepts to real-world scenarios. Although you mentioned art's role in understanding history and self-awareness, giving detailed examples would make your argument more convincing.

Task Achievement

Each paragraph should revolve around a single main idea that is introduced clearly at the beginning and developed throughout the paragraph. Ensure that this main idea links back to the question prompt to maintain relevance and focus.

Task Achievement

Elaborate on your ideas further to flesh out your arguments and enhance the comprehensiveness of your response. Aim to offer deeper insights into why art is beneficial for children's education by expanding on the points you've raised such as practical skills, life experience, and interpretation skills.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

self-expression
critical thinking
problem-solving
cultural awareness
tolerant society
STEM subjects
employability
rigorous subjects
curriculum
school budgets
enriches
complements

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Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many people feel that attention spans are becoming shorter due to the prevalence of social media. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a notion that says developed countries should avoid encouraging expert workers of developing countries for emigration, because the poorer countries need their professional workers

These days, more and more people tend to procrastinate in tasks. What is the cause? What is the solution?

In some countries, the number of shootings increase because many people have guns at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?