IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Students in schools and universities learn more from their teachers than through other means such as the Internet, libraries, and TV. To what extent you agree or disagree?

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Some people believe that
Use synonyms
Internet
Correct article usage
the Internet
show examples
, TV, libraries and other technology can better teach students than
the
Correct article usage
apply
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teachers
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.
Linking Words
While
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apply
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I strongly disagree with
this
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 statement, because individuals can have better conversations with
teachers
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 in
class
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 and it is about clear
data
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 and
information
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that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
provide
Wrong verb form
provided
show examples
Use synonyms
teachers
Change preposition
to teachers
show examples
 at schools and universities.
Firstly
Linking Words
, if individuals study with some technology without help from the teacher, it means that in
this
Linking Words
class
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 will not have
conversation
Add an article
a conversation
the conversation
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. It is undeniable, that communicating about the topic with classmates and with
teacher
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the teacher
a teacher
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 during the
class
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 will have
impact
Add an article
an impact
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 on your learning
better
Rephrase
apply
show examples
and understanding
the
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of the
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 topic clearly.
For instance
Linking Words
, for me better way to fully catch the statements that I have in
lesson
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a lesson
the lesson
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,
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apply
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 is to
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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talk about it with my friends.
Also
Linking Words
, clear
data
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 and clear
information
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 are important in searching and studying. Many sites on the
internet
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gives
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give
show examples
 some false
information
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 and sometimes there is different
data
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 that provide
internet
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 in different sites.
For example
Linking Words
, when I was younger, I had homework to
search
Verb problem
do
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 about our ancient Rome.
However
Linking Words
, during the
search
Add a comma
search,
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 I saw a lot of
data
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 and
information
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 which is on the
internet
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 about one topic. I
can
Wrong verb form
could
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 not decide
wich
Correct your spelling
which
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 of the the
data
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believe
Wrong verb form
believed
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, but
then
Linking Words
 I found it easily by lecture which
write
Wrong verb form
wrote
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my
Change preposition
to my
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 teacher in the lesson.
To sum up
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 all mentioned before, strongly disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement, because individuals can have better conversations with
teachers
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 in
class
Use synonyms
 and it is about clear
data
Use synonyms
 and
information
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
provide
Wrong verb form
provided
show examples
Use synonyms
teachers
Change preposition
to teachers
show examples
 at schools and universities.

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coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a limited use of cohesive devices and lacks a clear progression of ideas. To improve, ensure that paragraphs are well-structured, with clear topic sentences and logical sequencing of ideas. Also, make better use of linking words and transitional phrases to connect ideas smoothly.
task achievement
You have attempted to address the task, but your response is under-developed. Your ideas are not fully extended, and examples are not sufficiently specific or detailed. To enhance your score, work on fully responding to the prompt by developing each point with specific details and examples. Ensure that each paragraph explores a clear main idea in depth, and avoid superficial treatment of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • direct instruction
  • personalize
  • learning experience
  • immediate feedback
  • clarification
  • social skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • vast amount
  • information
  • resources
  • self-directed learning
  • independence
  • critical thinking
What to do next:
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