Some people believe that the most important aim of science is it improves people' lives. What extend do you agree or disagree?

#people #aim #science #lives

Nowadays, technological advancement has a direct influence on our lives, some believe that

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scientific breakthroughs must raise people’s

life

quality. I agree with

this

statement to some extent, but we should consider that we are not alone on

this

planet. On the one hand, science should boost different aspects of human

life

and increase people’s

life

quality.

Firstly

, in the field of medicine, scientific improvement has a positive impact on our lifespans and decreases the rate of mortality noticeably,

for example

by simple vaccination in our childhood we are immune to numerous diseases.

Secondly

, through transportation development, individuals are able to experience a more comfortable

life

than before and technology provides us with a safe and fast journey.

Finally

, by inventing various types of machines, most of our responsibilities are taken by robots which offer us more free time and a convenient

life

On the other hand

, science should not only serve humans. There are tremendous numbers of creatures, who are sharing the Earth with us, and the majority of them are in danger of extinction because of human activities, scientists should address some solutions to tackle

this

problem.

Furthermore

, air pollution which is caused by carbon emissions could be solved by scientists' contributions,

for instance

, by using more renewable energies

such

as solar panels and wind turbines

instead

of fossil fuels. In conclusion, my view is that science should raise our

life

qualifications, meanwhile , the environmental issues and other creatures must not be forgotten.

Submitted by Negar_seddigh on Sun Jun 02 2024

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coherence cohesion

Consider refining your essay's logical structure. While your points are well-expressed, the transition between them could be smoother to improve readability.

task achievement

Ensure that all points are fully supported with relevant specific examples. For instance, adding more detailed examples in the second paragraph regarding transportation and machines could strengthen your arguments.

coherence cohesion

You have clearly presented the introduction and conclusion, making your essay easy to follow and understand. This helps provide a good overall structure.

task achievement

Your essay thoroughly covers the main points of the topic and gives a balanced response, showing consideration of multiple perspectives.

Word Count

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A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

246 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that the most important aim of science is it improves people' lives. What extend do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

Most people think that truth should be objective rather than subjective when it comes to news. Do you think all news true? What is the function of newspaper?

nowadays a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and trearments instead of visiting their doctors.do think this is a positive or negative dvelopment?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion. (rewrite)