Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual docto

#people #health #alternative #medicines #treatments #docto

There are different opinions on whether to choose

alternative

medicines

or consider doctor

medicines

This

essay will elaborate

why

Change preposition

on why

show examples

I believe that visiting doctors is the best way to overcome

illness

or injuries.

Firstly

alternative

medicines

could have a bad impact on people's health.

Although

some would argue that several

alternative

medicines

are herbal, there is no proof

clinically

Rephrase

apply

show examples

dermatologist

Fix the agreement mistake

dermatologists

show examples

that the

medicines

can heal the sickness.

For instance

, some said that washing eyes with certain kinds of leaves can heal

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

eye problems. In fact, rather than solving the problem, the sickness could get worse.

Secondly

alternative

medicines

do not use a proper test to identify the real

illness

. They

also

do not have a certification for their practices. Eventually, it could lead to some misidentification of the

illness

because the

alternative

medicine only interprets the sickness by

experiences

Fix the agreement mistake

experience

show examples

For example

, a victim

from

Change preposition

show examples

a car accident who experiences a fracture sometimes tends to go to massage treatment

instead

of going to the hospital. Rather than

find

Wrong verb form

finding

show examples

the best remedy for the

illness

, it just delays the best time for treating the patient properly.

To conclude

, from my point of view, visiting a doctor should be a priority for people rather than trying

alternative

medicines

. Abandoning doctors to try other untrusted treatments is a negative development considering not everyone knows their bodies well and the difficulty to prove the effectiveness of these

medicines

. People should

take

Verb problem

consult

show examples

their doctor to solve their health

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

so the

illness

or injuries

could

Wrong verb form

can

show examples

be treated appropriately as soon as possible.

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Wed Nov 29 2023

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coherence cohesion

You need to ensure that your essay contains a clear main idea in each paragraph that connects to the overall position stated in your introduction and conclusion. Consistency in your argument throughout the essay is key.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of the essay could be improved by making clearer connections between ideas with the use of cohesive devices. Transitions should not just signal the beginning of new paragraphs but also relate back to the previous content for an overall seamless flow.

coherence cohesion

Main ideas need clear support and elaboration that are relevant to the topic. Your examples should be specific enough to convincingly illustrate the points you are making.

task achievement

Your response should be fully developed to answer all parts of the task. This includes addressing the prompt completely and not just focusing on one aspect of it.

task achievement

Ideas should be clearly communicated with comprehensive arguments. Strategies include clearly explaining the reasoning behind your opinion and expanding on how it addresses the topic.

task achievement

Use a range of relevant examples to support your arguments, ensuring the examples given directly support the claim you are making in the paragraph. Generic examples weaken the overall response.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual docto

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business, and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some students prefer classes with frequent discussions between the professor and the students with almost no lectures. Other students prefer classes with many lectures and almost no discussions. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

In many countries, international tourism has become an important source of income. However, it also has negative effects. Do the benefits of international tourism outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.