Some museums and art galleries charge admission fees, while others have free entry. Do you think the advantages of free admission outweigh the disadvantages?

#museums #art #galleries #charge #admission #fees #entry

Museums

and art galleries are

places

of education and entertainment. Some of them allow free entry to visitors,

while

others charge an entry fee. I believe that the benefits of providing visitors with free entrance tickets to

such

places

surpass its disadvantages. The main benefit of free admission to

museums

is that more people may visit these

places

This

is because it makes it affordable for most people, especially

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

those who are not willing to spend their money on museum tickets and believe that it is a waste. Not having to pay for the ticket, more and more tourists and local people may tend to visit, leading to the increasing importance of the

museums

This

may

also

bring many tourists to the city/town

due to

the popularity of the museum and

hence

, benefits the

overall

economy of that place.

Furthermore

, allowing free access to

museums

may

also

lead to encouraging many schools to bring

students

for educational purposes.

This

is because

students

do not have to pay any fee for the entry. Being able to exhibit local

museums

students

will be able to learn a lot about a variety of subjects. Take

for

Add the comma(s)

, for

show examples

example, scientific

museums

display a large number of models which can play a key role in demonstrating and explaining a concept to

students

Subsequently

this

encourages

students

to engage in science and enhance their understanding of science concepts which may

further

motivate them to become future scientists.

However

, a drawback is that it is harder for the government to maintain the

museums

without any admission fee. Many museum keepers are already facing challenges to run the

museums

and keep them updated.

In contrast

, I believe that citizens pay a huge amount of tax which should include the care and maintenance of

such

properties. In conclusion, I believe that the educational advantages

due to

the free access to these

places

surpasses

Correct subject-verb agreement

surpass

show examples

the difficulty of maintaining them on public tax money that

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

receives.

Submitted by miranda.urmi on Wed Nov 29 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure ideas flow logically from one paragraph to the next, utilizing cohesive devices effectively. Show clear relationships between ideas without over-reliance on conjunctions.

coherence cohesion

In your introduction, aim for a stronger thesis statement that explicitly outlines the main points to be discussed. The conclusion should restate your position and provide a summary of the key points without introducing new ideas.

task achievement

Expand on your main points by offering more detailed examples and evidence. This can involve citing specific museums, studies, or other sources that can substantiate your arguments.

task achievement

Ensure that every paragraph advances the overall argument by staying focused on the prompt. Devote each paragraph to asserting and explaining a single advantage or disadvantage related to the question.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

326 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some museums and art galleries charge admission fees, while others have free entry. Do you think the advantages of free admission outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

"Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?"

Online shopping is now replacing shopping in the store. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

It is as important to teach children to protect the environment as it is to teach them to read and write. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Currently, there is a trend toward alternative forms of medicine. However, at best these methods are ineffective, and at worst, they may be dangerous. To what extent do you agree with this statement?