Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others, ​however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.​ Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Whilst some
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
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that mobile
phones
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can only
use
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for personal
purpose
Fix the agreement mistake
purposes
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, others say that
this
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communication
device
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should be used
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besides
Change preposition
for
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personal
such
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as
work
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. I
also
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argue that mobiles should
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use
Wrong verb form
be used
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for
work
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purposes
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too. On the one hand, cell
phones
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Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
are used
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mostly for personals
which
Correct pronoun usage
who
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chat with friends, speak to someone, play mobile games and upload pictures to social media. It is
fact
Correct article usage
a fact
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that
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this electronic gadgets
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this electronic gadget
these electronic gadgets
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can be
fulfilled
Verb problem
used
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to
Change preposition
for
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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personal
use
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and we can save more personal
informations
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information
pieces of information
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in
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on
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Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these devices
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device
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at present like credit card details and passwords.
For example
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, if a person misses his phone, all information will be lost because all details are stored
in
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on
show examples
mobile
phones
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.
Therefore
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,
this
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device
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Use synonyms
use
Wrong verb form
is used
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personal
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for personal
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purposes
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.
On the other hand
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, mobiles can be utilized more for
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work
Correct your spelling
work-related
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related too, all features and apps are contained in
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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gadgets
such
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as
computer
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computers
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. Wherever we
work
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any office
realted
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related
work
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by
this
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device
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without making any mistake with accurate speed and process.
For instance
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, office 365 apps from the
microstore
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microsite
microspore
micro store
app
is
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are
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contained all
android
Capitalize word
Android
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phones
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,
as a result
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, people can easily
work
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any
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on any
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office related
Add a hyphen
office-related
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activity with mobile
phones
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such
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as
power point
Correct your spelling
powerpoint
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presentation
Fix the agreement mistake
presentations
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. I argue that
this
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device
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should be used more for
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work related
Add a hyphen
work-related
show examples
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
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in order
to
Change preposition
for to
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folks
can
Verb problem
apply
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finish
work
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quickly without
computer
Add an article
a computer
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. In conclusion,
although
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phone's
Correct article usage
a phone's
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usage
more
Add a missing verb
is more
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for personal
purposes
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, it can be used vastly for
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work
Correct your spelling
work-related
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related too because all
mobile's
Change noun form
mobile
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features and apps are designed for not only personal
usus
Correct your spelling
use
but
also
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the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
Use synonyms
purposes
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too
Rephrase
apply
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. In my opinion about
this
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, mobiles should be used more and more for
work
Use synonyms
realted
Correct your spelling
related
activity.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the ideas within the paragraphs are logically ordered. Use cohesive devices appropriately to signify the relationships between ideas.
task achievement
Expand and develop your main points further with examples and explanations. Each viewpoint should be explored equally, and your own opinion should be clear and well-supported throughout the essay.
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