IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Write about the following topic. People are never satisfied and always want more. In what ways is this a good thing and in what ways is this a bad thing? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

#topic #people #minutes
Individuals are trying to have more and never feel contented in their life.
This
 opinion can be seen from two points of view, and
this
 essay will explain more about
this
 opinion.
First,
if human could never build pride in themselves, the positive thing is they could be critical to their performance. From that, they might be criticized for their performance or in every situation that they face. To illustrate, if they are doing a project and have a sense of critical, perhaps they can run their project well and
also
 enrich their pre-existing knowledge. Another good news is they might become perfectionist.
According to
 the research, perfectionist could devote their time to finishing their project wholeheartedly and carefully.
This
also
 creates the potential capability to become more motivated and more learning.
Thus
, positively, never feeling satisfied could develop someone to be more critical and a perfectionist.
However
, if we can view it from another side,
this
 sense might be bad if it is still. People with excessive desire might become greedy. They will do everything, whether good or bad, to achieve their aim.
Furthermore
, they would not consider any bad effects of their wrongdoing.
Also
, it could grow envious. Humans who never feel satisfied always feel envious. They never see what they already have as enough.
As a result
, they feel another accomplishment might be their burden and do not want to develop their skills.
Therefore
, on the downside, one cannot feel content in the heart could make envy and greed bigger. In conclusion, satisfaction is the best thing that humankind should have. By having satisfaction, a human can set their boundaries and run their life with competence and enjoyment.
Submitted by sharontaaa on

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introduction
Ensure your introduction directly addresses the task topic and question. It should provide a clear overview of what the essay will discuss, setting the stage for the reader.
body paragraphs
Your body paragraphs must be clearly structured and each should focus on a single main idea. Begin each paragraph with a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph.
examples
Use more specific examples to support your arguments. While you have provided general examples, adding personal or widely recognized examples can greatly strengthen your essay.
linking words
Improve coherence by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly within and across paragraphs.
conclusion
Your conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points of your essay and clearly state your final stance or the outcome of the discussion.
analysis
To better meet the task's requirements, ensure each paragraph not only presents an idea but also analyzes it deeply, explaining how and why it is relevant to the main topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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