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Band 4.5

The chart below gives the percentage of social media user by age in Jamestown in 2018.

The chart below gives the percentage of social media user by age in Jamestown in 2018.
The provided pie chart elucidates the information about the percentage of social
media
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user
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users
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 by different age groups in Jamestown during 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be remarked that the maximum percentile of teenagers spent time on social
media
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while
Linking Words
 the
proportions
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proportion
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 of old age people
utilized
Correct pronoun usage
who utilized
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 social
media
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 was
minimum
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minimal
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 in 2018 Taking the statistical data into
Correct article usage
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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consideration it is evident that the highest percentile of teenagers
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apply
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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spent time on social
media
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 which can be noted as 40%
while
Linking Words
 the lowest percentile of old masses utilized social
media
Use synonyms
 which
can be
Verb problem
apply
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accounted
Change preposition
for
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as
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for
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 2%. It is worth noticing that the percentage of adults who used social
media
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 was more than the
younones
Correct your spelling
young ones
. The figure for the former was
35%and
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35% and
 for the latter was 18%. Turning to
rest
Correct article usage
the rest
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 of
details
Correct article usage
the details
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,
minute
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a minute
the minute
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 discrepancy of 5% can be seen in the percentage of teenagers and adults who
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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 time on social
media
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.
Major
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The major
A major
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 discrepancy of 16% can be noted in
proportion
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the proportion
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 of
youngones
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young ones
 and senior
citizen
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citizens
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 who utilized social
media
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words media with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
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