A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Status and money are highly valued in today’s society and have certainly changed our
values
to some extent. However
, in everyday life
I don’t believe a person’s worth is judged that differently compared to in the past.
It is apparent that most celebrities today are admired or envied solely for their material wealth or position in various social hierarchies. Many of these people are known to turn their backs on friends, cheat on their spouses or spend their evenings over-indulging in alcohol and/or drugs. Things like owning a mansion, driving an expensive car and getting into A-list parties are exalted above old-fashioned Add a comma
life,
values
. Ultimately, though, it is the many readers of gossip magazines and celebrity blogs who reinforce these ideas.
Nevertheless
, I do believe that in their day-to-day lives
most people still believe in Add a comma
lives,
values
such
as honour, kindness and trust. In some way
most of us want to form loving families, raise our children to be good citizens, stand up for the downtrodden and protect our communities from harm. We still form friendships, romances and business partnerships based on old-fashioned criteria. Add a comma
way,
For example
, when our trust is abused or we are unfairly treated, we see that as a major violation of our relationship and we judge the wrongdoer accordingly
.
In conclusion, while
status and possessions as a measure of a person’s worth have become more popular, the behavior
of most ordinary people shows that the old Change the spelling
behaviour
values
are still strong. It is unlikely that honour, kindness, and trust will ever be replaced while
parents continue to teach their children to respect themSubmitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Introduction & Conclusion
While your essay contained a basic introduction and conclusion, it could have been made more impactful with a stronger thesis statement and a summarizing conclusion to enhance your argument.
Supported Main Points
You presented main points to support your argument but they would benefit from being developed further. Including additional specific examples and elaborating on your ideas could strengthen your overall response.
Logical Structure
Your essay demonstrated reasonable logic and structure; however, introducing clearer transitions and better paragraphing to enhance the flow of ideas will make the coherence and cohesion stronger.
Complete Response
You have answered the question but there's room for a more detailed exploration of the topic. Try to cover all aspects of the statement being discussed, and make sure you clearly express the extent of your agreement or disagreement throughout the essay, for a more complete response.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
You presented clear ideas; however, adding a wider range of sentence structures and vocabulary could help articulate your points more comprehensively.
Relevant & Specific Examples
Your essay would benefit from more varied and specific examples related to the topic. By incorporating diverse and real-world evidence, you could more effectively back up your points and demonstrate an in-depth understanding of the subject matter.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!