Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?
Economics
is undoubtedly an important part of the growth of a country, however
, some people claim that the quick development of economics
would cause serious problems such
as the loss of social values.
The prosperity in economics
greatly improves individuals’ life quality in many ways. Firstly
, the increasing amount of expenditure dramatically raises the tax revenue collected by governments. This
revenue can be used effectively to enhance the infrastructure in cities, which contributes to the improvement of individuals’ lives. More specifically, electric
network, Correct article usage
an electric
transport
system can be established to meet individuals’ daily needs, scale of schools and apartments can be expanded to ensure more opportunities for not only children but Correct word choice
and transport
also
workers. Moreover
, the increasing funding for technological innovations can also
be taken into account. According to
the long history of human beings, innovations have always promoted the progress of society. Machines liberated labour, phones convenient communications, vehicles
significantly shortened the time needed for us to travel.
Correct word choice
and vehicles
However
, an opposite voice declares that some problems also
appear as the result of rapid financial advancement. A higher speed of economic growth requires a higher working intensity. Nowadays, even the 996 work schedule appears, which means workers have to work twelve hours a day, six days a week. The heavy agenda reduces the time that can be spent on recreation or entertainment, causing a serious stress issue, and it can also
cause physical issues for employees. In addition
, individuals always connect happiness with income, in other words
, with their consumption level, because more money earned means more commodities are able to be purchased and the substances owned create a consolidated foundation for daily lives. Nevertheless
, this
opinion can be superficial and obey the social value. In traditional social values, happiness can be generated through not only materials in real lives, but also
spirits created by relationships, social identities, and even self-achievements.
In conclusion, although
it is admittedly that a speed up development in economics
has its drawbacks both physical and mental, economic development is the general tendency of the world and can provide numerous benefits that outweigh the disadvantages.Submitted by felixdai89 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure consistency in the development of your argument and avoid abrupt transitions between points.
coherence cohesion
Utilize a wider range of cohesive devices to create smoother connections between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
Your essay could benefit from a more explicit thesis statement that outlines your stance on the issue.
task achievement
Make sure to directly address the question and clearly communicate the advantages and disadvantages throughout your essay.
task achievement
Incorporate relevant examples to substantiate your main points and strengthen the impact of your argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!