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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people arque that it is more Important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life, Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Many
people
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 debate whether
job
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satisfaction
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 or a high salary is more crucial for a happy
life
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. Some might argue that enjoying their
job
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 leads to
happiness
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,
while
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 others believe that financial freedom and security provide stability and a better quality of
life
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. In my opinion,
while
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 wealth is important for meeting basic human needs,
job
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satisfaction
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 is more important because it leads to long-term
happiness
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 and personal goals. One reason why I think
job
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satisfaction
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 is more valuable than a high salary is that
people
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 spend a large part of their lives working. Most
people
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 start working in their early 20s and retire in their late 50s or early 60s. That’s about 35 years of working a
job
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. If someone dislikes their
job
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, they might experience stress, anxiety, and dissatisfaction, regardless of how much they earn. A
job
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 they enjoy allows them to feel motivated and passionate about their
work
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, which improves their mental and emotional health.
Also
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 allowing them to keep on working regardless of their age.
For example
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, a teacher who loves and enjoys teaching kids valuable lessons may feel happier and more content than a highly paid assistant who dislikes their stressful
job
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. Even if the teacher earns less, the joy they get from their
work
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 makes them have a better
overall
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 quality of
life
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. Another reason why I think
job
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satisfaction
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 is more important is that money doesn’t buy
happiness
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. Like I said before,
while
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 money grants financial freedom and security, it cannot replace the sense of
happiness
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 and contentment that comes from a
job
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 that one loves. Many wealthy
people
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 suffer from burnout and unhappiness because their jobs are stressful.
For instance
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, doctors and corporate lawyers often earn high salaries but face extreme pressure and long working hours,
not to mention
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 the fact that doctors have to save
people
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’s lives, adding more stress to their
work
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. And the worst-case scenario is that, if they fail, they might even feel depressed.
This
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 shows that financial success does not always lead to a better
life
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. In conclusion,
although
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 a high salary can improve financial security, and help to achieve financial freedom,
job
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satisfaction
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 is more important for
overall
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happiness
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 and well-being.
People
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 who enjoy their
work
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 tend to be more motivated, less stressed, and more fulfilled in
life
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 rather than
people
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 who are always stressed about their jobs.
Therefore
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, when choosing a career, it is better to prioritize passion and interest rather than focusing solely on income.

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task response
Your introduction clearly presents the topic and states your opinion succinctly. Make sure to summarize both viewpoints in a balanced manner in the body paragraphs.
coherence and cohesion
The organization of ideas within paragraphs is logical, but consider using more transitional phrases to enhance the flow between points. For instance, you could use expressions like 'on one hand' and 'on the other hand' when discussing opposing views.
task response
You have provided compelling arguments supporting your view, which are well detailed and thoughtful. This showcases a deep understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraph structure is clear and easy to follow, making it simple for the reader to understand your main points.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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