Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?
It is
the
fact that nowadays young Correct article usage
a
people
are affected easily by their peer
friends’ behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
while
there are some arguments that it brings many disadvantages. This
essay will analyze why I believe that the inconveniences of this
are outweighed by its merits.
On the one hand, peer
pressure
brings a host of drawbacks. First and foremost, when people
are under peer
pressure
, they usually feel stress
, frustrated and disappointed Wrong verb form
stressed
about
themselves. Change preposition
in
This
is because of the fact that looking at other's success might make them feel lack
of Correct article usage
a lack
confident
and even consider themselves failures. Another compelling idea is that they might doubt their abilities when doing something Replace the word
confidence
that is
harder. A very important point to consider is that when seeing their peer
people
's success, they may have negative thoughts that only outstanding people
can surpass challenges except
Change preposition
apply
them
. Correct pronoun usage
apply
This
will make them "real failures".
On the other hand
, I believe that in spite of the downsides given above, the benefits are more significant. The primary reason is that peer
pressure
also
gives them motivation to try their best and surpass their limits. For instance
, peer
pressure
has created a competitive environment for people
to challenge themselves, so they will build ambitions and passions of being champion
for themselves. Fix the agreement mistake
champions
Furthermore
, when they join in
a group of good Change preposition
apply
people
, they can be nice people
like their friends. To illustrate, when they have good friends, they may see and learn their friends’ behaviors
. In Change the spelling
behaviours
a
long run, they will have good habits and Correct article usage
the
behaviors
Change the spelling
behaviours
,
and will Remove the comma
apply
be better versions
.
In conclusion, Change the verb form
be better versioned
although
this
trend is not without disadvantages, the advantages will be far more significant if people
have willing hearts and ambitions. By considering all the pros and cons, people
will make the best decisions for themselves.Submitted by tranthitotam05111983 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The structure is present, but transitions can be improved for better logical flow.
coherence cohesion
Support each main point with specific examples and clear explanation to strengthen the argument.
task achievement
Make sure to fully address the task by discussing both sides of the argument comprehensively and providing a clear opinion on the matter.
coherence cohesion
Use a wider range of grammatical structures and vocabulary to enhance the complexity and precision of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing paragraphs that focus on a single main idea with clearly connected supporting sentences.
task achievement
Include a conclusion that effectively summarizes your position and the key points discussed in the essay.