Some people think that professional athletes make good role models for young people, while others believe they don’t. Discuss both these points of views and give your own opinion.

One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is

professional

Correct word choice

whether professional

show examples

athletes should be good

role

Use synonyms

models for teenagers or

they shouldn’t

Verb problem

not

show examples

. It is undeniable that imitation has become an essential part of our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

However

Linking Words

, there is no absolute agreement on whether it is worth having a

role

Use synonyms

model or not. II A commonly held belief that having a

role

Use synonyms

model does not

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

a bad result for young

people

Use synonyms

. As evidence of

Linking Words

this

Punctuation problem

this,

show examples

they point to professional athletes

have

Correct pronoun usage

who have

show examples

great

body

Fix the agreement mistake

bodies

show examples

, thinking and lifestyle.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, they have good discipline. It could be explained by the fact that their daily routine is usually very hard and

needable

Correct your spelling

demanding

for

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

discipline.

As a result

Linking Words

, it leads to young

people

Use synonyms

can

Verb problem

being able to

show examples

improve their discipline, lifestyle as

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

their idols. III

On the other hand

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

claim that having a

role

Use synonyms

model

Linking Words

such

Punctuation problem

, such

show examples

prof

Fix capitalization

Prof

show examples

. athlete isn’t a good idea.

For example

Linking Words

, they may mention that comparison with others isn’t

good

Correct article usage

a good

show examples

idea for

young

Correct article usage

a young

show examples

mind.

In addition

Linking Words

, all

people

Use synonyms

have different situations, health conditions and monetary conditions. The explanation lies in the fact

you

Correct word choice

that you

show examples

need to do based on your situation and adapt to yourself. And nowadays

Correct pronoun usage

it is

show examples

popular

body

Verb problem

to be body

show examples

positive, freedom of thinking and something another.

Therefore

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

do not believe in comparison with someone. In conclusion, taking everything mentioned into

account

Punctuation problem

account,

show examples

I would argue that professional athletes can make good

role

Use synonyms

models for teenagers.

dnm.best

Dec 1, 2023

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task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples of professional athletes and their positive or negative influences on young people.

coherence

Make sure to checking your essay for correct grammar and word choice, for example 'has not' should be 'have not'.

coherence

Use linking words to connect your ideas better, for example, 'First', 'Next', and 'Finally'.

positive

You clearly state both views regarding professional athletes as role models.

positive

The structure includes an introduction, body, and conclusion, which is good.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

234 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

exemplify
perseverance
discipline
humble beginnings
motivate
inspire
teamwork
sportsmanship
negative behavior
drug abuse
unlawful activities
sensationalizes
unrealistic
unattainable standards
material success
skewed value system
high visibility
magnifies
faults
misleading

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Some people think that professional athletes make good role models for young people, while others believe they don’t. Discuss both these points of views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Countries are becoming more and more similar because people are able to buy the same products anywhere in the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

robots and artificial intelligence are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. why is this happening do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?

International tourism has brought enormous benefit to many places. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on local inhabitants and the enviroment. Do the disadvantages of International tourism outweight the advantages?

The money spent by governments on space programmes would be better spent on vital public services such as schools and hospitals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

t is argued that the parents of children who break the rules should be punished in some ways as parents are responsible for the children's actions. To what extent do you agree or desagree?