Currently, there is a trend toward alternative forms of medicine. However, at best these methods are ineffective, and at worst, they may be dangerous. To what extent do you agree with this statement? Use examples and explanations to support your opinion.

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The use of traditional medicines has been on the increase in recent times.
However
, these forms of drugs may not work well and are sometimes harmful to our bodies.
This
essay agrees with
this
statement because not only does little or no research go into the formulation of local medicines, but
also
, these preparations do not treat specific illnesses.
To begin
with, a single alternative medicine may be said to cure a wide range of diseases.
This
is because these formulations are not taken through the necessary processes to extract the exact active ingredient for a specific malady.
Hence
, an individual may not be cured when he takes
such
medication. I once took a traditional drug when I was diagnosed with malaria.
This
preparation was
also
marketed as being effective against fever and headache. On completing it, the fever and headaches I experienced disappeared and I felt well for a
while
, but they re-surfaced after a few days. I found out I still had the parasites in my blood when I got tested a second time.
Consequently
, I was not cured after swallowing the pills.
In addition
, alternate forms of medicines have not been properly researched ; especially to determine their side
effects
and contra-indications. In certain parts of the world, herbalists ,
for example
, wash the leaves of medicinal plants and offer them to patients to chew. These leaves have not been scientifically tested to determine their negative
effects
.
Subsequently
, a lot of these patients end up with dangerous outcomes.
For instance
, research has concluded that the pawpaw leaf, which is popular for treating migraine in most developing countries, is the leading cause of kidney disease in sub-Saharan Africa.
Thus
, the lack of research can lead to an increase in the number of people experiencing the toxic
effects
of unorthodox drugs. In conclusion, other forms of drugs may be less effective and harmful to our bodies despite a general increase in their use. I agree with
this
statement because there is a lack of investigations into them.
Secondly
, their positive
effects
are non-specific.
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coherence cohesion
The essay has been assessed, and several aspects need improvement to meet the IELTS standards. The logical structure is weak and sometimes difficult to follow. It's important to present a clear argument in each paragraph and use evidence and examples that directly relate to the argument. Enhance the organization of ideas by employing cohesive devices and ensure that each paragraph flows logically into the next.
coherence cohesion
Although the essay has an introduction and a conclusion, both need to be more developed and clear. The introduction should set the stage for the upcoming argument, while the conclusion should succinctly summarize the main points without introducing new information. Ensure that the thesis statement is clear and that the conclusion restates it and the key arguments effectively.
coherence cohesion
The main points provided to support the argument require further development and stronger support. When mentioning examples or evidence, ensure they are specific and detailed enough to reinforce the point being made. Avoid general statements and strive to provide clear, specific examples that convincingly back up the claims.
task achievement
The response to the task must be complete, which means fully developing all parts of the prompt's questions. Ensure that you address all parts of the question, give a balanced view where required, and offer a definitive opinion if the question asks for it. Back up your perspective with well-chosen examples and thorough explanations.
task achievement
Your ideas are somewhat clear but need to be expressed more comprehensively. Aim to develop each paragraph around a central idea and ensure that the examples given are directly relevant and expand upon that idea. Each paragraph must have a clear function and contribute to the overall argument or point of the essay.
task achievement
Examples and explanations used should be relevant and strengthen your argument. Use specific examples that effectively illustrate the points you are trying to make, and ensure that they are clearly linked to the topic. Avoid using examples that are too general or do not closely relate to the main topic.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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