Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to cooperate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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It is argued that
children
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should be motivated to be more competitive,
while
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others feel that teaching them to be cooperative will be of more value as they enter adulthood. I believe that
while
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competition can help young people be successful, cooperation is more important because it teaches them to
work
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within a team , a crucial interpersonal skill. Some argue that instilling a sense of competition in
children
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helps them to achieve success in whatever they do.
This
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is because being competitive creates a drive to win, which
further
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teaches them that hard
work
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and
self disciplines
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self-discipline
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are keys for
such
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wins.
For example
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, it is
pften
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often
the case that
children
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who
participte
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participate
participated
in competitive sports are less likely to quit when outcomes are unfavourable and difficult.
Hence
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, they would be more likely to overcome obstacles and setbacks in any of their
life
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events. Despite
this
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, I would argue that
children
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require
lesson
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lessons
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on teamwork more than the will to win. If
children
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are taught to be cooperative, they learn the importance of working in a team, which is
someting
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something
adults are expected to do. Through working with others,
children
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learn not only how to respect different opinions but
also
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how to pool their strengths.
For instance
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, preschools include cooperation as one of the first essential skills in their curriculum.
This
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is because
,
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apply
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educators recognize that it is a vital social
skills
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skill
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in all ways of
life
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. I,
therefore
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,
belive
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believe
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that teaching
children
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to
work
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with others is more important than giving them a sense of competition. To summarize,
while
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equipting
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equipping
a competitive mindset might help young people to
succed
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succeed
in
life
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, I am of the opinion that teaching them to be cooperative would grant them with ability to
work
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as part of
the
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a
show examples
team and community which is far more valuable later in
life
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.
Submitted by MS Tha on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay maintains a clear and logical structure throughout, making sure that each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices appropriately to signal the relationship between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Each main point should be developed fully with clear explanations and more specific and relevant examples.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the task, ensuring that you discuss both views and provide your own opinion clearly and comprehensively.
task achievement
Make sure your ideas are expanded and clearly linked to the essay prompt, ensuring they are well-thought-out and not repetitive.
task achievement
Include more specific and varied examples to support your points and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
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