IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

what are the main problems associated with the internet and what are the solutions?

#internet
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a growing concern about the extended
use
Use synonyms
 of the
Internet
Use synonyms
, especially the amount of
time
Use synonyms
 spent on social
media
Use synonyms
 sites.
While
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 used to spend most of their leisure
time
Use synonyms
 doing activities that were beneficial both physically and mentally, these days, many
people
Use synonyms
 have sedentary lifestyles by spending many
hours
Use synonyms
 browsing the
Internet
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 behaviour can lead to
addiction
Use synonyms
 to
internet
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 and disconnection from social face-to-face interactions. One of the main problems that
Internet
Use synonyms
 usage can cause is
Internet
Use synonyms
addiction
Use synonyms
.
That is
Linking Words
 to say,
people
Use synonyms
 who spend
hours
Use synonyms
 browsing different sites without restricting their screen
use
Use synonyms
 tend to suffer from
addiction
Use synonyms
 symptoms. A personal pertinent example is that we have recently noticed that our daughter spends
hours
Use synonyms
 on the
Internet
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of doing her school homework. The solution is for
people
Use synonyms
, including parents like us, to be aware of the detrimental impacts of spending significant
hours
Use synonyms
 on the
Internet
Use synonyms
 and curb the number of
hours
Use synonyms
 used for social
media
Use synonyms
 activities. Another major challenge is the family disconnection.
Internet
Use synonyms
use
Use synonyms
 can cause families to lose their close bonds.
For instance
Linking Words
, households where each person has an
Internet
Use synonyms
 device and spends
hours
Use synonyms
 on social
media
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of engaging with family members’ chats are more likely to be disconnected.
Consequently
Linking Words
, children could miss the parenteral guidance and advice they were supposed to obtain. The way forward is to diminish the
time
Use synonyms
 spent on the
Internet
Use synonyms
 and social
media
Use synonyms
 sites and allocate more
time
Use synonyms
 to family members. By doing
this
Linking Words
, families could establish and maintain a close relationship.
To conclude
Linking Words
, many
people
Use synonyms
 spend plenty of
time
Use synonyms
 surfing the
Internet
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 can lead to problems, incorporating
addiction
Use synonyms
 to the
Internet
Use synonyms
 and hassle in spending
time
Use synonyms
 with family and friends. The solution for these problems involves reducing the
time
Use synonyms
 spent surfing the
Internet
Use synonyms
 and prioritising families over the Web. If
such
Linking Words
 steps were in place, we would be able to avoid stress related to
internet
Use synonyms
addiction
Use synonyms
 and build a strong family relationship.
Submitted by Farh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that paragraphs are well-organized and each main point is sufficiently developed with specific examples and details.
coherence cohesion
It is important to structure your essay in a way that each paragraph logically follows the previous one to maintain a strong and clear line of thought.
coherence cohesion
While the introduction and conclusion are present, aim to make them more impactful. The introduction should clearly state the problems and solutions you'll discuss, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your argument without introducing new information.
task achievement
Address the task's prompt fully by ensuring that your response not only states the problems and solutions but analyzes them in-depth, providing comprehensive insights into the impacts and the effectiveness of the proposed solutions.
task achievement
To enhance clarity and depth in your essay, ensure that your ideas are fully expanded upon with clear explanations and that each point you make directly relates back to the question prompt.
task achievement
Use more varied and precise examples to substantiate your arguments. This elevates the relevance and specificity of your points, making your essay more persuasive.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • revolutionized
  • instantaneous communication
  • social media platforms
  • virtual meetings
  • e-commerce
  • global marketplaces
  • streaming services
  • online gaming
  • content creation
  • remote working
  • cyberbullying
  • internet addiction
  • access to information
  • professional development
  • privacy concerns
  • educational resources
What to do next:
Look at other essays: