The pie charts below show the percentage of five kinds of books sold by a booksellere between 1972 and 2012

The pie charts below show the percentage of five kinds of books sold by a booksellere between 1972 and 2012
The pizza graphs above describe the percentage of five different types of
books
sold by a shop from 1972 to 2012. It
is showed
Wrong verb form
shows
show examples
three charts, one in 1972,
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
in 1992, and the
last
in 2012.
Overall
, in 1972 and 1992, there was almost the same distribution of all categories, but in 2012,
books
about
adult
fiction
increased a lot and
biography
Fix the agreement mistake
biographies
show examples
decreased quite
.
Correct article usage
a.
show examples
Analysing the data about 1972, it is possible
to conclude
that three kinds of
books
sharing
Wrong verb form
share
show examples
the preference of the readers:
adult
fiction
, children's
fiction
, and biography, each one with 20%. The group "others" got 25%. Twenty years later, in 1992, the scenario has
change
Change the verb form
changed
show examples
little.
Adult
fiction
raised
Verb problem
rose
show examples
to 25%, children's
fiction
raised
Verb problem
rose
show examples
to 22% and biography dropped to 15%. After more
20
Change preposition
than 20
show examples
years, in 2012
adult
fiction
jump
Wrong verb form
jumped
show examples
to 45%, kids'
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
increased
only
Change preposition
by only
show examples
3%,
whereas
books
about
life
Add an article
the life
show examples
story
Fix the agreement mistake
stories
show examples
of people
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
to just 8%. Travel
books
and the class "others" complete the pie chart. Both groups
achieving
Wrong verb form
achieved
show examples
the
less
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
percentage in the
last
period.
Submitted by fmulato on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
Vocabulary: Replace the words books, adult, fiction with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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