IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 1

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today.

#plans #show #park #first
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The plans show a public
park
 when it first opened in 1920 and the same
park
 today. As it
shown
Add the auxiliary verb
showed
has shown
show examples
 there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
couple
Add an article
a couple
show examples
 of
enterence
Correct your spelling
entrance
,from Arnold Avenue and Eldon street.There
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 so many changes within no more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 100 years.Almost everything had changed apart rose garden which is located at the top of
Add an article
the
show examples
left
side
. In 1920 there was a fountain in the middle of Grange
park
Capitalize word
Park
show examples
,which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 rebuilt
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
big
Correct article usage
a big
show examples
 rose garden surrounded by seats.Everything was destroyed,on the right
side
 of
park
Add an article
the park
show examples
.In the
Correct your spelling
corner
cornor
Add a comma
cornor,
show examples
 there is a children's play area and a cafe nearby.Entering from
underground
Add an article
the underground
show examples
 car
park
 of
eldon street
Correct your spelling
Eldon Street
show examples
 users can exit
to
Change preposition
through to
show examples
Water
Correct article usage
the Water
show examples
 feature. Coming to
left
Add an article
the left
show examples
side
 of
park
Add an article
the park
show examples
,everything was removed
exept
Correct your spelling
except
Correct article usage
a
show examples
small garden of
rose
Fix the agreement mistake
roses
show examples
 at the top.All seats
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
this
side
 were removed.
Instead
 of
stage
Correct article usage
a stage
show examples
fir
Correct your spelling
for
show examples
 musicians was built an Amphitheatre for concerts.
Submitted by yoqubjonovjamshidbek23 on

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structure
The essay lacks a logical structure with clear paragraphs and a logical sequence of information. Consider organizing the essay into introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion to enhance readability.
introduction/conclusion
The introduction and conclusion are not clearly defined or may be missing. These elements are essential in framing your essay and summarizing the main points discussed. You should construct a clear introductory statement and a concise conclusion.
supporting details
While some comparisons between the past and present park are made, the main points are not always supported with detail. Expand on the key differences with more descriptive information to support the main points you are discussing.
task completeness
The essay does not fully address the task as the changes are not described comprehensively. You should provide a more complete comparison of both plans with detailed descriptions of all the major elements in the park.
idea clarity
Ideas are presented, but they could be communicated more clearly. Pay attention to clarity and the logical presentation of information, so readers can easily follow the comparison between the two periods.
examples
Specific examples are present, but they lack the necessary detail to effectively illustrate the changes in the park. Use more precise language and detail to bring your examples to life.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • recreational facilities
  • landscaping
  • naturalistic
  • amenities
  • formal gardens
  • ergonomic
  • symmetric designs
  • inclusive
  • accessible
  • accommodations
  • native plant species
  • societal changes
  • visitor services
  • community events
  • evolution
  • modern playgrounds
  • wildflower meadows
What to do next:
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