the diagram illustrates how bees produce honey. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

the diagram illustrates how bees produce honey.

summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
The diagram provided illustrates how
honey
is produced by
bees
.
Overall
, the process consists of seven stages from building the
hive
by
bees
to the packaging of
honey
. First of all,
bees
build a container to save
nectar
. It is known as
hive
Correct article usage
a hive
show examples
which consists of many individual cells. After that,
bees
search for suitable flowers and select them to get great
nectar
.
Bees
collect the
nectar
from the flowers
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
bring it into the
hive
. They put the
nectar
in the cells of the
hive
carefully and save it
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
several times. During these times, the process of evaporation happens. Evaporation is the process of removing the water content from the
nectar
.
Next,
the liquid becomes more viscous and it is ready to be collected as
honey
. The
honey
is harvested from the
hive
.
Finally
, it is packed in bottles in two ways, including the
hive
or without the
hive
. Afterwards, it is distributed
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
the purchasers.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 80%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words honey, bees, hive, nectar with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Metamorphosis
  • Nectar
  • Foraging
  • Pollination
  • Worker bees
  • House bees
  • Honey stomach
  • Honeycomb cells
  • Beeswax
  • Evaporation
  • Hexagon-shaped
  • Simple sugars
  • Enzymes
  • Capping
  • Preserve
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