Some people believe that children should be made disciplined by making them obey rules and do what their parents and teachers want them to do. Others, however, believe that those children who are controlled are not well-prepared to tackle the challenges life brings to them. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Nowadays, numerous people think that youngsters should be
made
disciplined by making them obey rules and what their Verb problem
apply
parents
and teachers
want them to do. But others, believe that those children
who are not controlled are not well-prepared to tackle the challenges life
brings to them. In this
essay, I will discuss with views and explain the reasons.
Firstly
, If children
are following obey rules
given by Correct article usage
the rules
parents
and teachers
, then
they are good citizens of the nation and made of discipline. To explain, parents
and teachers
always guided
Wrong verb form
guide
to
those for education and social skills with Change preposition
apply
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
experienced
basis. Replace the word
experience
For example
, as per a survey by BBC News, when children
get proper guidance from family members and institutes then
they learn a lot of things and easily understand the right or wrong path. Rephrase
apply
Hence
, good parents
always give valuable things to our
Correct pronoun usage
their
children
and help to improve their behaviours with others.
Secondly
, sometimes parents
are extra possessive of children
they are always controlling with them. To elobrate
, If we are trying to exessive control Correct your spelling
illustrate
then
worst effect on them. They do not feeling
confident and Change the verb form
feel
not
a good decision maker in the future, and always in fear they are doing right or wrong work and not prepared for Add a missing verb
are not
the
future problemsCorrect article usage
apply
. .
Replace the punctuation
.
...
For instance
, as per a report by WHO, every years
thousands of people Fix the agreement mistake
year
died
Wrong verb form
die
due to
illness of
depression and not Change preposition
apply
tackles
the challenges in Wrong verb form
tackling
life
. The
results, Change preposition
As the
parents
help to
them to Change preposition
apply
prepared
to tackle every situation in Wrong verb form
prepare
life
.
In conclusion, boths
are important for Correct your spelling
both
children
to obey rules given by parents
and teachers
, It helps to become good citizen
for them and learn a lot of things. Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
Parents
gave
them some space but Wrong verb form
give
looking
their Wrong verb form
look at
activites
Correct your spelling
activities
,
so that they do not choose any wrong steps Remove the comma
apply
on
Change preposition
in
them
Change the pronoun
their
life
.Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Submitted by lavneet.kumar45 on
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task achievement
Your introduction lacks a clear thesis statement that presents your view. The essay's body paragraphs should have argued both views distinctively before providing your opinion. Carefully structure your paragraphsâone topic per paragraph. The conclusion should summarize your discussion and clearly state your position.
coherence cohesion
Work on ensuring each paragraph has a clear central idea, supported by cohesive devices. Topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph can help with this. Use a range of cohesive devices to link your ideas and sentences, and ensure that pronouns are used accurately and coherently. Give a logical sequence to your essay's argument.